After a two week all-expenses paid holiday the BB housemates eventually put us out of our misery and paid their dues by casting their first nomination votes on Monday night (20 August).
Bertha and Justice got the most votes and Meryl used her Head Of House winning status to replace Bertha with Jeff.
Seeing everyone crack through their voting was hysterical - I was impressed that none of them wasted time going on about how bad they were feeling blah blah. They've done it in between but once they were in the diary room they went for it and actually seemed to enjoy themselves.
Best of all by far was Meryl who gets a gazillion points for the professional way she handled Head Of House and for making such a perfect call - Jeff''s contributed absolutely zilch except those terrible early-morning grunts.
What was also chuckleworthy was seeing everyone else waiting for her outside in the lounge in wide-eyed terror knowing they were at the mercy of a boozy, boob-fest sletty.
Here's how everyone voted to get to Justice and Bertha:
Justice:Vote 1: Bertha
Reason: For not getting along with her.
Vote 2: Meryl
Reason: For her behaviour in general, for their fight and for her disrespecting him.
BerthaVote 1: Justice
Reason: For having run-ins with almost everyone in the house. (Went on to mention the weekend fiasco and said he’s having a really hard time – suggesting he might want to go.)
Vote 2: Jeff
Reason: For knowing the least about him. (Went on to mention that she’d tried to draw him out but still knows nothing about him.)
Kwaku:Vote 1: Offuneka
Reason: Because she wasn’t an exemplarary leader during a task and didn’t pay enough attention to him.
Vote 2: Justice
Reason: For being inconsiderate and having too many petty altercations that could have been avoided.
Max:Vote 1: Meryl
Reason: Because women deserve to be respected and Meryl doesn’t respect women.
Vote 2: Richard
Reason: For mistreating Justice because of his height.
Jeff:Vote 1: Bertha
Reason: For starting arguments about what he eats.
Vote 2: Justice
Reason: For being easily absorbed into arguments which get blown out of unexpected proportion.
Maureen:Vote 1: Meryl
Reason: For making Justice uncomfortable.
Vote 2: Bertha
Reason: For being bossy.
OffunekaVote 1: Meryl
Reason: For making comments she doesn’t think through that have negative effects on the people they’re directed at.
Vote 2: Lerato
Reason: For being shallow and for saying things that hurt the other housemates.
LeratoVote 1: Jeff
Reason: For being withdrawn in a box and seeming scared to explore other things. For just sitting there and looking at everybody.
Vote 2: Offuneka
Reason: For having the most exchange of words with her.
Code:Vote 1: Justice
Reason: For not being accommodating of other people’s views.
Vote 2: Maureen
Reason: For playing mind games. For being the only person who’s true colours he hasn’t seen.
RichardVote 1: Jeff
Reason: For eating and eating.
Vote 1: Justice
Reason: For not being competitive as a contributor.
Tatania:Vote 1: Lerato
Reason: For being cool, for talking a lot sometimes, for being too much.
Vote 2: Bertha
Reason: Because she’s very solid, good and always knows what to do.
Meryl:Vote 1: Bertha
Reason: “I feel that she’s not in here for a true reason. I have not seen anything about her that’s appealing towards me for her to be in this kind of game.”
Vote 2: Jeff
Reason: For not being the kind of person she wanted to be around all the time; to have conversations with.
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Voting Awards:
Here are some awards I've put together for the way things went down:
Most idiotic votes:
Everyone who voted for Meryl i.e. Offuneka, Maureen, Max and Justice. wtf? How could they possibly think she'd be nominated and not replace herself??
Max's vote for Meryl. She's a chick for goodness sakes - she can't be disrepecting them if she is one.
Most cryptic vote:Both of Tathinia's. At first I thought she voted for Lerato 'cos she's irritated by her but then when she added Bertha and said what she did it led me to think she's intimidated by them both or sees them as potentially potentially popular and wants to get rid of them soon. What do you think? If this is how she's voting, she's got a strategy different from everyone else's.
Most creepy vote:Maureen. What's up with her?
Most misguided vote:Maureen's reasoning for Justice. Puhlease - if he's feeling uncomfortable ... I was gonna say he's grown-up and big enough to look after himself but of course he isn't. Still, it's a rubbish reason.
Most crap move on Big Brother's part:Not letting Justice into the Diary Room when he kept ringing. I was dying to hear what he had to say in those moments - it's what the whole show's about. It would have provided at least an hours extra, different entertainment.
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As for who my vote goes to this week - Jeff most definitely! It'll be too ridiculous if he gets to zone out for another three weeks. Also, I don't think he'd mind leaving.