SOUTH AFRICA'S TV WEBSITE
SIGN IN SEARCH MENU
SOUTH AFRICA'S TV WEBSITE


Fak'Imali Uzobona

Written by KeleFabulous from the blog Scorpio on 31 Mar 2009
Favourite this post


Now i aint saying she a gold digger
But she aint messing with no broke niggas...


I'm no gold digger but I do feel a man needs to give a little sometimes. Things like going out to eat, movies or any kind of entertainment; if a guy asks he must pay. On the other hand I also don't mind if I'm the one who did the asking. Black men should provide for their women. Even though I've never asked for one to do so for me I strongly feel a man should put himself in a position where he'll be able to properly care (yes, financially too) for his woman. 

In this tough economic climate, life is becoming way too expensive for my small pockets and I've decided it's time nami bang betjele. First I need to get a man before that happens but before then I'd like to get training on how I can get what I want without looking/sounding like a gold digger.
I don't want a man buying me clothes and paying for my rent or whatever... ngi funa imali esandleni!

Over the years I've come across all kinds of women that ask their men for money and the men who happily give it to them. Now before I take that route, I'd like to know from these men (those that give and those that don't) if you're in a relationship with a woman and you feel your relationship counts for something (other than sex), would you be okay with your woman asking you for money? What is asking for too much? What asking for a reasonable amount. Being the woman that I am I myself wouldn't mind giving my man money (not lending) if he asks/needs it. My ex was the first guy I ever exchanged cash with - he'd give me sometimes just nje and at times when I needed it (though I never asked, it just came at the right time) and nami I wouldn't mind go mo tlatsa moo le moo and paying for meals when we went out. And it was never a question of one spending more than the other. I think this is okay. 

Asking for money is tough, at least for some of us. I have NEVER asked a guy for moola. And I think I would wait till the relationship was solid before taking the leap. But how do I ask without sounding like a gold digger or seeming like money is the only thing I want out of a relationship. And how do I know that I'm getting it with no strings attached ie him thinking just cause he gives me money he owns me. 

Ladies, please teach me. And fellas, share your thoughts and experiences and expectations from such an exchange. 

PS I do hang out with broke niggas LOL
And nina aba thanda u kulwa please keep it neat or move along!!!





60 Comments

KeleFabulous
31 Mar 2009 14:45

show me the money

cleve
31 Mar 2009 14:54

Molilo
31 Mar 2009 14:59

i also find it difficult to ask men for money even R20, but this will come in handy

TheLady
31 Mar 2009 15:01

I need the lessons to, though there's this grandpa (literally!) who has been shelaring me for about 5 years now. I don't have a heart to phoxa (tell him off) coz when I am absolutely broke he just pitches and gives me some moolah. The most he has given me at one time is R3500 to buy a phone...cheap skate LOL.

He is old madala all I need to say is "I'm going to our other office this week and he'd gooi R500 for petrol. My girls love him to bits.

I don't think I'd make a very good gold-digger-one time he hugged me and than gave me smack on the lips..i FLIPPED and  felt naar...he apologised and never tried that stunt again-he doesn't even hold my hand-I cancelled the hugs too. I guess if I was screwing the nigger I'd have a house and nice car...hmmm-tips girls

Cody
31 Mar 2009 15:09

wow nice article Kele!!! i've never had a boyfriend who gives me money. i am so unlucky when it comes to those and it's true asking for money is very very very very difficult!

tulani
31 Mar 2009 15:11

Faki acc no: uzo bona

Vesa
31 Mar 2009 15:11

Lol at TL...I've also had an old madala shelaring me! He was prepared to throw money at me as he even mentioned it himself....but my conscience couldn't allow any of that. He was promising me all sorts of things (a car, townhouse, groceries even trips overses) and I was still a struggling student back then......my friends have never been soo angry with me the day I refused money when he offered!!  

Cody
31 Mar 2009 15:13

one time he hugged me and than gave me smack on the lips..i FLIPPED and felt naar

OMW ROTFLMAO!!!!!!

dali
31 Mar 2009 15:16

LOL tulani

ngwana
31 Mar 2009 15:19

LOL @theLady  - Ask yourself if you would be sleeping with this man if he didnt give you money. If the answer is yes then there is really nothing wrong with it.
but if the answer is no, then you are selling yourself.

I had a 'daddy' when i was a student, was not very attractive and he was in his 40's (i was 19) he had so much money i found it overwhelming. I regret that relationship cause even though he paid my rent, paid for my hair, took me on his business trips - I sold myself. I would never had been sleeping with him if he wasnt spending money on me.


ms.tebby
31 Mar 2009 15:24

hayi wena tulani...

LOL TL<<I cancelled the hugs too>>< tl tl tl tl...poor man, shem!

nekzo
31 Mar 2009 15:28

iyo I have never asked a guy money....but now I wish ngabe I have thought my self to ask a guy for money it's too late now

maud
31 Mar 2009 15:29

please point me where i can find those old madala, mina empilweni yami , i am so unlucky  on that side, all the boyfriends i met, yilabo abacabanga ukuthi imali ngiyayidobha. aftrer two weeks, umtu wakhona uzoza ne excuse yokuzama ukuboleka imali then thats when i say good bye.

some even say i left my petrol Card  at home,can you please pay for my petrol i will give you, yooo , 

why do you think i want an expensive Ring, ukubhadalisa sonke lesikhathi bengingatholi niks.

dali
31 Mar 2009 15:31

kele put down ure acc no tulani means busines or have u PMed him already............LOL 

Ms T i dont think there's anything wrong with what tulani is doing let him spoil kele.

TheLady
31 Mar 2009 15:36

I have never slept with him ngwana-the thought alone is revolting!!! He calls me "mfana" imagine him being romantic ke..

nekzo
31 Mar 2009 15:46

I have never slept with him ngwana-the thought alone is revolting!!! He calls me "mfana" imagine him being romantic ke..@ TheLady what is wrong with that "mfana"..LOL

Cody
31 Mar 2009 15:47

Faki acc no: uzo bona

LMAO!! i didn't see this! you are funny Tulani!!! LOL

TheLady
31 Mar 2009 15:49

yho nekzo "mfana" is just bad...worse ke when he needs to tell me something "Wemfana"...nah

Katlegom
31 Mar 2009 15:52

I honestly feel offended when a woman ask me for money. It just feels wrong to me. It really feels great when i offer to give a woman money to do her hair/nails and so forth. i reallt hate it when she ask for it unless is a emergency.
i dont want to fell used or disrespected.

Too many transport favours are even a worse thing to ask from me 

Toxic
31 Mar 2009 15:53

I don't want a man buying me clothes and paying for my rent or whatever... ngi funa imali esandleni!

kwa kwa kwa kwa!!!!!!!

Sjoe Kele this is so me! i can NEVER ask for money-EVER!

Toodecent
31 Mar 2009 15:57

Katli you took words outta my mouth...I dont know why but it just becomes a turnoff when a woman asks...I rather offer.

Best-Achiever
31 Mar 2009 15:57

mna i neverask for money but my Bf ofetn times gives me money to do my hair, sometime just give me money to but what i want ... i also give him money to but whatever he wants if   decide not to buy it myself.

and he is the first person to know if there is something worrying me whether financial or otherwise and often times he is the one to help me out of situation. Like this other time ... i left my wallet wt home KZN, i do most of the things via internet but when i needed hard cash, he gave me... i did pay some of it back in my own terms because he didnt want me to pay him.

awelani
31 Mar 2009 15:59

I have never askd any guy for money EVER...

wena Mfana,. stop using the poor madala if u aint gonna give it up,lol

LMAO @ tulani

Best-Achiever
31 Mar 2009 16:01

to but what i want  = to buy what i want
to but whatever he wants  = to buy whatever he wants

zulugal
31 Mar 2009 16:08

good one KFB.

Nami ive never ever found a guy who gives me money and i never ask for it unless im really desparate.  But they do buy smallanyana thingies like paying for movies, and small groceries for the house like juice, those things.

yha nami i need to know where to find ministers of finance/bond/vehicle.

monchooza
31 Mar 2009 16:11

Katli and TDC....nami bafwethu its like that kimi......

Toxic
31 Mar 2009 16:11

TL, you're collecting a hilarious collection of short stories!!!!!! Flippin funny mfana!

zulugal
31 Mar 2009 16:25

But also if its not in you its not, if u not used to doing something u just cant do it.....

Mafresh
31 Mar 2009 16:30

If u dont learn now, forget. the sooner the better, i wish i cud turn back time, just to quicky go back and learn go ikopela. Men today dont give if u dont ask.
Go on, even if u have to google it, JUST DO IT. U will never b sorry

Mafresh
31 Mar 2009 16:42

E e man Katli no TDC, le fosa dipockets here (missing the point). Taba ena e so: Men are hunters/providers and rona he(ladies) are managers. So don’t wait to be asked, hmmm, just provide. A lot of gents never offer…haai ke mathata fela.

TheLady
31 Mar 2009 16:52

"But also if its not in you its not, if u not used to doing something u just cant do it....." It's belittling to me it is...I'm just not bold enough to ask.
 I feel awkward just taking the cash, when I say thanx I really feel bad-so now he puts it in my bag and I act like I don't notice LOL

Ayi awe-I can never, he knows it he sees it- I think it's because he thinks that I'll someday count all the money he's given me and I'll fell guilty/loved and give in...never

Yho mfana kunzima...LOL Tox

TheLady
31 Mar 2009 16:52

And he is not married and he says he doesn't have kids...I wish I was 40!

awelani
31 Mar 2009 16:53

okay Mfana, lol

Toxic
31 Mar 2009 17:00

Vala'mehlo uzobona TL!!!!

awelani
31 Mar 2009 17:04

LOL @ Tox

Mfana, how old r u?? 

daz he have a beer belly?daz he still have ol his teeth&hair? If u answered yes to these 2 Q's then wats stopping u from having a relationship with him?

J-Girl
31 Mar 2009 17:10

I wish some1 could give me the liver to ask for money from a man,i get Sh*t scared even though I am desparate for it at times, and the thought of him saying no scares the living daylites out of me, how am I gonna face him again???

monchooza
31 Mar 2009 17:10

as much as i dont like it when a lady asks me for money...I love spoiling her with prezzies though.......mara at times i think girls are just selfish...they never think of buying us anything unless its our birthday

Cody
31 Mar 2009 17:13

Huu sis Awelani and Toxic! you are just a bad influence on TheLady lol !!!!!!!

TheLady
31 Mar 2009 17:23

uyababona kodwa Cody?

Mfana, how old r u?? 
25

daz he have a beer belly?daz he still have ol his teeth&hair? If u answered yes to these 2 Q's then wats stopping u from having a relationship with him?

Hayi yo I can't even stare at long enough to notice how the teeth are...all I know is that he paid 3/4 million rands in cash for his house...he changes cars every 6 months, I wish I had an aunt to marry him...

awelani
31 Mar 2009 17:28

He bot a house for 3/4Mil CASH, changes cars every 6months....Gal,,Dyaaaaaaam,, tell me again Y u aint doing his old stinkin rich arse....u will never have to work a day of your life..is he fugly??

Toxic
31 Mar 2009 17:35

TL is sitting on a goldmine and is still looking for a boyfriend to give her change. Unjani mara?

Msoe
31 Mar 2009 17:41

TL ngyasola mfaner mubi lobaba or else uyidixa lol

Mafresh
31 Mar 2009 17:41

TL casher that lotto, lefu la hae le a mphedisa style.LOL

DJ Why why
31 Mar 2009 17:49

Tl tlt lt lt tlt thatha thatha@TL nantso i yellow Lambor, i heard they recently opened a Porsche dealership ....@ TL, uthini???

DJ Why why
31 Mar 2009 17:50

...... Porsche dealership in Jozi somewhere......

mathata
31 Mar 2009 19:00

Gold digger Tip

I have R120 000,but the car i want to buy cost R280 000,so what do you think my love.

i wish today you can giveit to me like hell...tiger..tiger.....

DJ Why why
31 Mar 2009 19:07

After googling this is what the interenet has to say as  a tip to be a gold digger, i cud nt help but lol at the "encouragement part".. ha hah ha!

"Be nice to them. Do not abuse or demand anything from them. Be friendly, respect them, and offer them encouragement when they want to spoil you".

DJ Why why
31 Mar 2009 19:14

Kwa kw ak wkakwka k awkjakwkak!  @ number 6 and 7: i have visuals of number 7...... i need to print these seraas!

6. Make sure you do not take money with you when you go to the movies. Do not reach for the check when they take you out to dinner. Thank them kindly however, and hold them tenderly. Smile at them and make them happy. ............ Let them foot the bill and enjoy being pampered.
     

7. Take them out shopping. Walk around and window shop at each store. Be excited when you find something you like. Tell them sadly that you wish you could afford to buy it. Sigh and start walking away. They may offer to buy it for you, but do not say 'yes' immediately. Tell them 'I could not let you do that'. ........ The next time you both go shopping, look at even more expensive items.

In time you won't need to remark about them. Just look! ...............

DJ Why why
31 Mar 2009 19:26

Marrying a millionare sounds like a lot of work..... lol, check out : HOW TO MARRY A MILLIONARE

6.  Avoid swearing, drinking, drugs, laughing loudly, aggressive behavior, and flashy outfits. Don't smoke even if they do. Work on a more elegant style. Think classy and understated, not "labels". You want to be the girlfriend then wife. Not the mistress.

Molilo
31 Mar 2009 19:33

Eish maybe my laughter is the one that is driving them away from me, will work on it. Thanx dj

cnhlanhla
31 Mar 2009 22:57

hay one just never stops learning

TheLady
01 Apr 2009 09:50

Thanx DJ-the drinking is only thing between me and a millionaire...

awe he is plain UGLY!!! No f*%king can happen there...and he wants to get married...Oh my mom bandla...Msoe he dresses well, comes to shop koSandton once or twice a month-phela he stays in KZN-he offered me a job as an HR manager at some municipality...LOL-I studied IT

Mafresh
01 Apr 2009 10:06

TL, make me your cousin, nna I'll reap the benefits from usbari.

DJ--where can 1 go, just to meet this BEE's/Millionares

Earth
01 Apr 2009 11:14

eish,its not easy asking for money,but you'd think gore after some time of being together,you'll be comfortable,I only ask for small amounts,like less than R100 for adhoc stuff,and sometimes I get the feeling that he doesn't want to and then he'll insist on giving the money to me.As for going out,when he takes me out,he pays...when I take him out I pay its just something that we've never really discussed but seems to work out a lot better...

KeleFabulous
01 Apr 2009 13:22

TL 3.5 grand??? haai the guy really is still dreaming of a happily ever after

to the guys, that's the thing, i'd really rather NOT ask, it would be nice if one could just offer and minimise all the akwardness that comes with it. mara men hardly ever offer and if they do it's only enough to cover necessitiies which for whatever reason i'll have trouble covering fo rhtat month...there's never enuff to spoil myself...

Vesa
01 Apr 2009 14:08

DJ--where can 1 go, just to meet this BEE's/Millionares

Try Melrose Arch on Fridays.....there's always lots of them there!

DJ Why why
01 Apr 2009 18:17

Thanx DJ-the drinking is only thing between me and a millionaire.

LOL @ TL

@ Mafresh, i hope u are sorted ke nge Melrose Arch.......



Mafresh
02 Apr 2009 10:25

@ Mafresh, i hope u are sorted ke nge Melrose Arch.......

Partially, so when can i go c these guys, weekends/During the week, lunch time or evening. Thanks Vesa no DJ

maud
02 Apr 2009 10:28

Dainfern country club- yilapho izingangara zikhona.

VusiK
11 Aug 2009 19:40

Guys!!!

Chasing money is a lot harder than making it

Television only makes gold digging look easy. (and we all know why)

Even the guys who seem to have money are buried in their Bull and Bills.

Those who claim otherwise have nothing but Bull for you!

PS. I am getting married, It'd more economic than dating!


Only TVSA members can reply to this thread. Click here to login or register.






LATEST ARTICLES

New on TV today: Friday 22 November 2024

Bread & Roses on Apple TV+ tells the plight of Afghan women as Nat Geo Wild camps out on Africa's Blood River.


Scandal! Teasers - December 2024

A wedding proposal, a familiar face returns and Ndumiso basks in the glory of his apparent heroism.


Binnelanders Teasers - December 2024

Joe tells his sister about his visit to their father’s mistress. Ouch!


New on TV today: Thursday 21 November

BBC Earth takes you around the Solar System and a Wicked special airs on E! ahead of the film premiere.


My Naam is Farah Teasers - December 2024

Immigration officials turn up at Farah’s home. And then she receives a call from a ghost.


Survivor 45: See who lovestruck Austin's dating now

Are Austin and Dee still together? Find out here as we reflect on the season.


New on TV today: Wednesday 20 October

Our Oceans, narrated by Barack Obama, airs on Netflix and Dave returns to Disney+ for Season 3.


Summertide Teasers - December 2024

Martin grapples with Charlie’s ex and Gavin finds Rebecca at the beach. Sunset, silhouette...


The River 6 on Mzansi Magic Teasers - December 2024

Cold, warmer, hot. Veronica and Kedibone get closer to the truth.


Kelders van Geheime Teasers - December 2024

Dewald calls Annette, Shireen, Edmund and Du Toit together to sign the adoption papers.

LATEST SITE ACTIVITY


More activity at TVSA Central



LATEST SOAPIE TEASERS



LATEST SOAPIE TEASERS





×
×

You browser doesn't have Flash, Silverlight, Gears, BrowserPlus or HTML5 support.