Am I a racist?

Written by sthini from the blog Am I a racist?? on 29 Jan 2010
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Its funny cos i am the only black person in my compay, and the complex I stay in...

I know this is a sensitive issue....

But i just cant seem to get over the feeling that the smiles are fake, the conversations are out of sympathy, or by force....basically as if hey are just tolerating us(blacks)

I have a lot of white friends, and i do call them my white friends, but if they were to call me their black friend, I would immediately take offence and think of it as a racist statement.... If they dared said said something about my skin color, my culture, my type of music, my food, etc, that would be enought to get me heated up...At work i feel like they undermine my intelligence sometimes because i am black....Eish now i sound like Julius Malema....I feel like i need to work extra hard to prove myself.... another example i was blocked from facebook, cos apparently i am always on FB, while i only used it like for only +-an hour a day, while the other employees are on FB through out the day...

Everything I do is scrutinized to the bone...

So ma Bloggers does this mean i am racist, selfish, or just plain ignorant...

Whats your take, and what do u suggest i do???

15 Comments

GML
29 Jan 2010 12:46

Dont let the number of white people around you overshadow who you are. You dont have to smile back or make silly small talk just to make them think you arent so bad.

You will end up loosing a good job and a nice place because of your insecurities.

You are paranoid and are looking for any reason, no matter how trivial it may be, just to accuse them of something or even just to be a victim. Don't do that.

just be yourself and ignore the *bleep!* out of them.

Especially at work. White people gossip about each other with each other.

Toodecent
29 Jan 2010 14:14

You and I ...we on the same boat and it aint cool at all.

Savanah Dry
29 Jan 2010 16:03

I feel kinda but my prob they forget i am black so when they start skinnering they go .... and these backs they do this and that ????????? helllo have you checked my skin color lately.

Da Diva
29 Jan 2010 19:08

Let mi read first

mathata
29 Jan 2010 20:13

tjo!in our compound.....same thing, this guy every morning show me a finger that when im driving im all over,his the one who bump to me,(ka monwana wa ntoto e nyane,tjo i got tired.

i show him a bird....(middle finger)the next day i saw 2ppl walking their dogs,.driving phela.....me ..waving hallllla,tjo hubby gave me the mongol face,i realise was the guy i showed a bird..

my compound is like white ppl in zimbabwe.n ba gatile sesepa im telling yaa.

honey147
01 Feb 2010 12:29

Toronto
01 Feb 2010 12:46

Juss accept that white and black will never be on the same level...and we will never think the same ....thats why we are different.

As it is strange to you it is also strange to them

Toodecent
01 Feb 2010 12:54

I like Toronto's response and nna I accepted that long ago. White and Black are not and will never look at each the same.

Holiday
01 Feb 2010 13:00

@chakalaka le papa i think you are a racist and just plain ignorant...

ms.tebby
01 Feb 2010 13:13

I have a lot of white friends, and i do call them my white friends, but if they were to call me their black friend,I would immediately take offence and think of it as a racist statement.... >>>>LOL you are a racist..chakalaka le chakalaka :-)

Lex
01 Feb 2010 13:25

Mara ya facebook yona,e unfair.

JadaPinkett
01 Feb 2010 13:29

GML said it all gal..............take her serious u'll be fine

sponono
01 Feb 2010 13:35

chakalaka you are racist full stop...LOL

and maybe YOU are the one "scrutinising everything..I mean with a sea of white people why would tehy just focus on ONE "TOKEN" black person..maybe if it was a group of blacks then they would feel threatened or curious or whatever..so whilest you are busy thinking that half the time they are thinking about you..they are NOT..so just live you life..you accepted the position..so either shape up or ship out...and stop whining...LOL...by the way people have the same curiousities and insecurities no matter what colour you are..so while others will say whites and blacks will never see things the same way...there are certain human traits that we ALL share...remember the way you respond to your surroundigns and circumstances will determine your happiness and ussually it also influences those around you coz you teach them how to treat you....so go ahead be the angry black woman..its your choice

myname
01 Feb 2010 14:02

Honey just change ur attitude otherwise u wil neva enjoy ur success. People wil always talk whether black or white or blue. And do urself a favour, b happy that u r working & u afford staying next 2 them. It shows that u r a top niggress.

honey147
01 Feb 2010 14:23

Okay ..i just saw this..
I believe..in fact I know racisim still exist..everywhere..
Our government pretend it does not..our society pretend they dont see a thing
but I know..most of us experience itin our everyday life..

I see that when i go to Spar in my neighbourhood..teh kind of look I get from most white people.."Like I shoul dnot be shopping where they do..I men Heloo it's Spar"
and when i get into my car..like i shouldn't even be driving in the first place.One white male even had the odousity to say to my face"You must have a good job huh"..and i answered and "you must have a small penis huh" and clearly small-minded...i mean after many years of so-called democracy..many people are still not free..okay..that's an understatement..many black people are still considered as monkey...creatures to be used,poked laughed at and abused and eventually trashed..

and it sickens me that older white men think they belong in your pants as you
are seen as "jungle-fever",and sorry I should be flirted ..excuse me..but i would not do any white male unless they are rich,good-looking,and sweet..and a good-kisser just like any other race...
and or that you belong in thier kitchen as the maid ..someone to clean after them...
and that for me is bull-shit..I do often tell them "mind your business and stop looking at my ass..as it seeems that's all I'm carring...

And also that if you do nt speak english you are stupid...
so excuse all the white people..Iam black and I'am proud..and to me race i s not an issue but your stinking attitude is ....
So no you are not ignorant..and racism against you should be dealt with
At work there are routes you can follow...

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