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Growing up

Written by Nok2laN from the blog Life and Decisions on 18 Oct 2010
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Yes when one has control it is a totally great feeling, however it becomes very awful when one faces challenges and hardship along  the way, and only to find out that nobody will help you take decisions, only you can make that decision. Sometimes it becomes so confusing because even you don't know what to do, thinking of the down sides of taking the final decision in the long run.

You have been dating this guy for 4 years now, you know his family and friends; and your family knows him also. Then you discover that he had children with other girls and didn't tell you about it. Then you confront your boyfriend with this, he denied it at first, but because you had all the facts, he ended up confessing. However, he said that it was a mistake, and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. Also his family kept this way from you because of being afraid to loose you. 

In your mind, you also want him to be part of your life and you don't want to have a relationship with anyone else; even though other guys approach you, and tell you that you are beatiful, your heart is with him. You have tried to get distance and be away from him, but you miss him a lot.
 
Now the question is, would you stay or would you leave?

POST YOUR COMMENT AND HAVE YOUR SAY!




10 Comments

GML
18 Oct 2010 13:24

4 years is a long time to keep that kind of a secret. I would think that him keeping it from you tells you how little he trusts you.

A relationship based on lies will be broken by lies. What other lies/truths has he kept from you?

What kind of a man keeps his children a secret from the woman he supposedly loves? What will happen when you end up having his child? Will he be different with your child? Will he also keep him a secret?

4years is a long time. It was not his family responsibility to tell you about his kids but it also tells you a bit about his family. Blood is thicker than water, I suppose....
How many kids does he have?

If I were you I would get myself to a HIV testing  centre and get tested. God knows how many "mistakes" his made in his life...

Is it fair on you? What if you had been the one who kept your kids a secret? Do you think he would still be around????

andi01
18 Oct 2010 13:43

stay away from a man with children, especially if he hides them from you. What you in for niw girl, is Lies, Baby Mama drama and more lies.

MakaB
18 Oct 2010 13:44

1. LEAVE HIM
2. DONT TRUST HIS FAMILY AGAIN, THEY ARE ALWAYS ON HIS SIDE
3. GET YOUR SELF TESTED
4. LEAVE HIM
5. LEAVE HIM
6. ALL OF THE ABOVE IS GOOD FOR YOUR HEART, YOUR HEALTH AND YOUR FUTURE.
7. GOOD LUCK

andi01
18 Oct 2010 14:11

ask yourself this
1. am I angry bcoz he has children???
2. am I angry bcoz he lied about it???

If you ask yes to any of the above. Then he aint worth it LOL

myname
18 Oct 2010 14:30

Sori skati but this love business doesn't have a formula. Mna ndithi do what u want coz deep down in your heart and mind u know what u want.

People we have options. Some of us are meant to grow old alone (like me lol) and some of us are lucky to have it all. Even if we can scream on top of our voices to leave this guy, at the end of the day u are the one who has to make that decision. Do your mistakes ngwana coz they are all yours and its up to you whether u fall or u undust yourself.

 LE NDLELA INDE WENA SANA and u need to be strong.

 

MAGNET2DISASTER
18 Oct 2010 14:39

walk away girl coz the web keeps getting bigger,believe me you,i know!

poshspice
18 Oct 2010 14:44

you should do all of the above! (comments by bloggers).

It is normal to miss him and wanting to be with him. I've learned that some people stay in our hearts for a long time and we miss them too but as time goes by it will be better. 

You will never completely forget about him but you should be able to lead a normal life, fall in love again and live happily ever after. 

poshspice
18 Oct 2010 14:52

How did you find out?

sesikavincent
18 Oct 2010 15:07

i agree with GML but you have to decide for yourself ............ he has children with more than one woman(i guess) and kept it a secret it doesnt sound good......... Good luck

pele
19 Oct 2010 12:46

did he make babies with these other woman while he was dating you?


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