EPISODE 1I had the best time the entire day on Sunday preparing myself as much as humanly possible for the premiere of Survivor SA.
By the time 5:55pm arrived everything around me, myself and my tasty refreshments were all soo incredibly sorted and comfy I could hardly cope as I sat waiting - filled with masses of terror that the show would be stuffed up and disappointing mixed with the thrill that it was all actually eventually happening.
It started, I sat breathless, then host Mark Bayly got zappily longshotted saying: "29 days. 14 castaways. 1 Survivor," and after I'd accepted the bland indecisive opening music I was filled with delight and got swept into the action completely.
I really enjoyed that the survivors were conned into thinking their plane was in mayday - espesh the look on Danielle Vukic's face that suggested she was convinced it was all very real. The way the plane landed in the mud was also excellent as a sign of the dirty cesspit that's to come.
This is how it all began with the 14 strangers thinking they were flying to some media briefing only to discover that the game had started and that they were already divided into teams - with Aguila very evidently physically stronger than Rana.
The teams are:
Aguila: Brigitte, Jude, Mzi, Nico, Sam, Sanele, Vanessa
Rana: Danielle, Don, Gareth, Jacinda, Lezel, Ncumisa, Zayn
Mark explained the meaning of the names - something about eagles versus intelligent frog creatures - and then told them that each team would get takkies for everyone and could each pack one rucksack with choice possessions from everyone's luggage.
After a mad scramble everyone launched into their first challenge to decide which team would get the best accomodation by winning Black Pearl Island and the immediately available teasure chest with provisions for fire and shelter.
Teams found petrol in the nearby village filled with sneaky locals who misled them, gassed up the engines of the boats and then sped off to Black Pearl where Aguila were the first to get their flag - despite a member of their team almost drowning.
Ha - how's Sanele possibly planning on surviving if he couldn't even swim that short distance?? The best was the way everyone responded to his near-death by saying it would have been terrible if they'd lost him so early in the game making it clear it would be no probs if it had happened later on.
Gareth Tjasink's highlighted head-foot dive off the boat was the most spectacular of them all I thought and being the doctor he is he had no choice but to try to save Sanele's flailing. Sam going back was to be expected too with the way he just assumed leadership once Aguila started setting things up afterwards.
From the look in Sam's eyes and his hairdo there's a verry thin tightrope he balances between being an ambitious leader and a psycho crazed control freak. Not that his taking over was all his fault - no-one else stepped up as the main decision-maker and motivator.
While Aguila ransacked their treasure chest and built their shelter Rana spent three hours miserably sailing to their island, spent a night sleeping on the cold ground (who were the two kerfuffling already?) and in the morning created a crap shelter while swimming in bikini's and pretending to be nice to each other.
They also proved that they won't be living up to the supposed braininess of their name because they didn't once mention trying to find the hidden treasure chest they were told about!
As each team got themselves organised there were a couple wanting to prove how invaluable they are but none of them could out-spotlight Mzi and his Rupert Provider strategy.
I like him already in leaps and bounds above some of the others - not only because he ended up catching the biggest, most succulent, least creepy fish I've ever seen on Survivor but also he was so confident he would do it he was prepared to pretend he'd already caught one and didn't stress when he didn't.
The only trouble with his early success is that the rest of the alpha males in Aguila (including Jude and that Vanessa chick with the sex-change voice) might start to be threatened too soon - guarenteed there's not gonna be anyone else amongst them who'll be able to catch what he has.
Luckily for them none of Aguila's insecurities were put to the test when they unsurprisingly won the Immunity Challenge which involved trudging a heavy pole through a swamp, untying a knot and placing it on a boat.
I must say I was surprised when Rana got the good lead start they did - for a while it seemed they had it wrapped up and even though the untying of the knot could have had something to do with their losing I was still very pleased when they decided to dump Don.
It was gobsmacking to see how radically he changed - one moment he seemed okay and the next he'd turned sulky and spoilt, sprouting all sorts of anti-chick rubbish. Clearly he wanted to be at the front and resented the fact that his yachting experience hadn't been taken into account and loses all sense of loyalty when he doesn't get his own way.
The way he manipulated everyone into speaking to him as if he was some kind of untouchable afterwards while he was sitting and cutting his nails (which should have been trimmed before he left home) was very unpleasant and I don't see how he didn't know it.
Do you think he wanted to get voted out? Why else would you behave so selfishly in the first moments when he had to know it would get him loathed? The way he said he hadn't had much sleep as if everyone else was in a different situation to him annoyed me a lot too, making his crimes way worse than Vukic's - for now.
I have no doubt that she's going to be a problem - not everyone could feel the way they did about her without there being
something. Unfortunately we didn't get to see any of her anti-Rana expression but what we do know is that she's an open book, strange (it's in her voice and eyes) and willing to lie.
I didn't believe either her or Tjasink when they said they didn't enjoy "the game". It's the usual blah-blah rubbish line everyone gives when they have to vote someone out and want to make as if they don't. You wouldn't enter the game unless you were super keen - which suggests there's a very conniving streak in the good doctor too.
The Tribal Council was cool - except much more ceremony should have been given to the Immunity Idol. It's such an important part of things but from what I could see in the few seconds of seeing it it's a yawny block of old wood. I would also have liked Mark to be more judgemental at the end by summing things up and pointing out their crimes before they all headed off back to their camp.
Vukic has to know that she's got a big target on her back and it would have been a perfect time for him to have upped her paranoia. Also it's only been 3 days and already they're scanniving without each other knowing. You'd think at this stage they'd be unanimous on who they were getting rid of and yet they were totally divided with three votes for Danielle and four for Don which suggests people have been whispering but not with everyone.
This is a super sign for us that highlights things are exactly as Mr Archers Aqua said - a polite lie between them all that has to be exposed.
As for immediate first impression faves - in Aguila it's Mzi for the reasons I've explained and in Rana - I liked the way Jacinda handled Don's putdown and the fact that she was at the front and tried.
Judging from the promo for next week Sam's going to get schizo with Mzi and if it happens with as much aggro as it seemed then he's gonna be the top of my Pig list big time.
Bring on next week!