I am bothered. No, I am actually worried about my relationship with drinking alcohol.
Social drinking is as popular as carrying branded water bottles at a gym even though u hardly take a sip from the bottle. For as long as I can remember I hated the smell of beer and could not understand how people become addicted to such a foul smelling drink. It didn’t help that this drink made people act terribly foolish and their company tiresome. Nothing beats being in the company of drunk people who suddenly entertain the notion that they are comedians. Triple sigh!
So it was by chance that I stumbled upon an alcoholic beverage called espirit and it was love at first taste for me. Not having any kind of income meant that I only indulged during the X-mas and New Year festivities. It was no wonder then that when I started earning an income and an opportunity to drink presented itself, I wouldn’t hesitate to order my favourite drink at the time…Espirit Kiwi flavour. I was still an occasional drinker then.
Whatever it is that happened and caused the disappearance of the Kiwi flavour from bottlestores left me in a bit of a dilemma. Do I stop my association with good old alcohol forever or do I write a passioned plea to the makers of Espirit about returning my lost love? I then tried other flavours of the beverage but never really warmed to them like I did the Kiwi flavour.
Enter Brutal Fruit. Yho! Yho! Yho! At first I drank it cause I convinced myself that the bottle has a very beautiful shape. I mean I thought I could have one and just keep the bottle on my ‘dressing table’ to admire.
Anyone that is a cider drinker can agree that at the time Brutal Fruit made its entry all the other brands of cider were packaged in similar shaped bottles. Here was a drink that was both pleasing to the eye and the tongue. A taste SENSEtation, I called it! Even though it couldn’t measure up to the nostalgic memories of my Espirit days, the kiwi brutal fruit matched it in taste.
Alas, I must have been a minority drinker because this drink UNBELIEVABLY disappeared as well. No forewarning, no chance given to bulk-buy it, NADA! Like it went into some Bermuda triangle! I wasn’t sighing anymore. I was being messed up. I was fuming-even wrote a letter to which I didn’t get a response. Nxxx to the power of 10!
Then I had a brief encounter with Woolies berry cooler, then 4 cousins and quickly outdrank my familiarity with the drink. I am now sick of 4 bazala. They shouldn’t have introduced those 3L bottles!
So now here I am mixing Amstel and sprite (try it!) because Cosmos don’t come cheap and I am wondering if I am on the road to obtaining the serious drinker’s accessory…the phuza face!
And on the matter of the phuza face, just H-O-W does that settle in on a person’s face? I mean I understand that beer and a flat tummy are sworn enemies but how does beer cause a phuza face? My friend figures that when you’re constantly getting sloshed, your face takes on a certain expression and if you continue drinking excessively, the expression sets in you then get the phuza face.
Think Blade Nzimande!
So, what’s your relationship with alcohol? What did u start out drinking and what have you graduated to? What’s your favourite cocktail?
EDIT:
IF you don’t drink and want to tell me to stop drinkin…errr, walk on by!
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