Am I just after sex?

Written by FoxyT from the blog Am I a Birch on 05 Jun 2009
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What am I?

I’ve always considered myself as being blessed. Never had to fight for anything or anyone in my life! I met lots of men who were good to me and wanted to treat me like a queen but always…always, I end up cheating on them.

So I have one question, am I a bitch or I don’t know what I want? I decided to settle down with someone. A good man, but not knowing that he would give me such stressssss. We now don’t even make love coz there’s always something to solve in the house! Even the “make-up” sex don’t work anymore.

He says I’m selfish…maybe I am. He wants me to be turned on everytime I see him and to just jump on top of him. But a girl gets tired sometimes. Now he wont want anything to do with me, saying that whenever I want to have sex I know where he is. But I ask again am I a bitch or is he cheating…like me?

Now my ex is back in the picture and I’m cheating again. Am I wrong? I don’t love him much but the sex is great. What’s a girl got to do when what ever she needs she gets from outside not where she’s suppose to get it?

112 Comments

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 08:01

???

maddie
05 Jun 2009 08:07

what star sign r u love?

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 08:08

Pisces

felfel
05 Jun 2009 08:15

Maddie is gonna solve this with a horoscope analysis, LOL!

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 08:17

Will that help though? I'm really struggling here...I'm even thinking hore I meet the wrong people.... Di kae di "soul mates"?

Sobza
05 Jun 2009 08:18

So I have one question, am I a bitch or I don’t know what I want?

Yeeeer sistas uthanda indoda kwaye uyakuthanda nokubhalwa.

Nonny
05 Jun 2009 08:21

U say ur man is GOOD but gives u allot of stress. Where is the good man part in that? A good man wouldn't have u so stressed out, and if he means as much as u say he does to u, u would've worked on ur relationship, insteading of cheating on him. But ke sisi, let me not judge u, vele mina izulu ngiyolizwa ngendaba....LOL

I think u need some time out from ur ex and ur man and then decide what u want in life, do u want to freelance (have sex-buddies, eg.ur ex) or u want to be in a steady relationship. At the end of ur dayo, ur what ever decision u take today, will lead u to where u land tomorrow.

Nonny
05 Jun 2009 08:22

Maddie is gonna solve this with a horoscope analysis, LOL!
hahahahah that's the same thing I though Felfel.

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 08:25

@ Nonny: Where is the good man part in that?

Here's the thing... He's a good man but too strict for my liking! I'm outgoing and wanna have fun most of the time. But yena ke, he wants me to go to work and stay home.

TerryN
05 Jun 2009 08:26

what star sign r u love?

r u sure u not a Gemini?? FoxyT.
Those are serial cheaters...

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 08:30

@Tazzy Those are serial cheaters...

I don't think I'm a "serial cheater". I think I get bored quickly... But guys tell me one thing...why does he have to force me to be horny everytime I see him....I believe that's a total turnoff

odie
05 Jun 2009 08:32

Tazzy - i am Gemini and i admit i am a serious cheater.
i have a problem with settling down cause. i just love to leave my life.

belz
05 Jun 2009 08:36

kwakwakwak @ freelancing. uthakathiwe FoxyT, udinga umkhuleko ostrong, like ifasting eserious, ayikho lento yakho lena.

odie
05 Jun 2009 08:41

@ foxy - how many times have you cheated?
how many sexual patners have you had. please answer?

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 08:46

@ odie - I can't believe you actually asked that. But NEway, not too much. I'm a late bloomer! "Only" had 4 sexual partner in my life but the problem is...I find myself cheating with my exes. What I find interesting is why wasn't I happy when I was with them.

belz
05 Jun 2009 08:50

ex syndrome is a biatch, he is an ex for a reason, leave them alone, as hard as it is.

Katlegom
05 Jun 2009 08:53

you are not the only one Foxy T, i have actually realised that women these days cheat on their men. married women cheat more. i shagged lot of those hey. I always ask myself gore why are they doing this to their hubbies. i guess thats the way life is now.

maddie
05 Jun 2009 08:55

i'm sorry Foxy to turn this into star signs and all, it's just that sometimes when things don't make sense in my life I turn to astrology, the universe has a way of telling us things. you sound like a gemini to me, plse tell me that date u were born.

Pisces

You are the artist, the dreamer, the enigmatic lover of all things ethereal. It is why of all the signs you may be the hardest to pin down, but once love sinks its teeth into you, your heart turns to mush and the Piscean mind which floats around so airily, lights of fire with passion and romance.

The Pisces can’t help but be an empathetic creature. They are always reaching out and if they touch you, their caring and sympathy can be infectious. It is why developing crushes on Pisces can be both rewarding and dangerous, and why being in relationships with them can be exactly the same. Their two sides can drive even the most accommodating lover insane but they can also find the right words to say when none seem to be appropriate.

Despite the Piscean ability to appear almost psychic they happen to be the only water sign that doesn’t have a shell (the others are Cancer and Scorpio). The fact that they live so much in their minds means that even the littlest comment, or offhand remark that seems to be directed at them, can completely unhinge them. This can make boy/girlfriend tiffs even more difficult since the ramifications of the standard relationship insults can have much more disastrous effects than anticipated. It is also good to remember that when starting to date, or even flirt with a Pisces, to make sure that only your best intention find their way to the surface and that any nefarious plans stay buried so deep that you don’t even know them.

If your Pisces feels threatened they will disappear. They can blend into walls, or bars, and like a chameleon they will make themselves scarce. In addition to this great invisibility to trick they can also give off such a mask of inapproachability that no one even wants to talk to them. This can also ward off unwanted romantic attention, but it can also prevent Pisces from the romance they desperately need in their lives.

***Hint to those interested in a Pisces: Don’t be off put by their standoffish nature, and pursue them gently but persistently, chances are you have nothing to with their flaky mood.

Because of the volatility of the Piscean personality and the sensitivity of their more spiritual and emotional personality they need a strong balancing force. This means that they tend to have a deeply important friend or relative or even a therapist, in their life, and that means that being in a relationship with a Pisces means accepting the other close connections that they have in their lives. If you learn to utilize and understand these connections they can work to help your dating and loving a Pisces, if you don’t and are threatened or suspicious of these people in his/her life, it will wreck your chances.

When starting to woo a Pisces it is important to remember that even though you may find them at first to be difficult to make decisions with, and usually have no idea what they feel like eating, or which movie they want to see, they are incredibly adaptive. Instead of constantly looking for their input it is important to use suggestion to tease out their wants and desires. They usually will love what you want and can be convinced to try any new food and watch anything, as long as it is short on violence and long on fun, thoughtful entertainment.

Best Relationship Matches

Virgo That ideal mate is your zodiacal opposite, but it is important to find a Virgo who is attenuated to your more soulful presence, and then you have someone who will pay the bills, and clean the house etc.

Cancer You water sign relatives will understand your deep emotional nature,

belz
05 Jun 2009 08:59

LMAO!!!!!! @ maddie

Strolicious
05 Jun 2009 09:01

4 partners u make me feel like a whore badlula iminyaka yami...amen to dat Belz ex syndrome is a biatch, he is an ex for a reason, leave them alone, as hard as it is.....i will neva ipha my EX ingamane idliwe izintuthwane...neva

odie
05 Jun 2009 09:02

@ Foxy - reason why i am asked is because my ex called me a bitch last night. why because i confessed that i cheated on him twice - thats when he dumped me. my to be new business patner called at around 10pm when i was with him and answered the call mo bathroom so he fumed. i didnt want to tell him about the whole thing because things were not nice.

we are in long distance relationship and he sometimes used to go cold on me for no reason and i thats when most of the time i cheated.

i have only had 6 sexual partners = do i qualify to be called a bitch???????
to think of it things that people do around are extreme and cause i cheated twice i deservce to be called that??

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 09:04

Worst Relationship Matches

Aries Too aggressive and harsh for your soft nature

Now I'm more than confused. My man falls under this star sign (Aries). So we dont match...

Strolicious
05 Jun 2009 09:06

Maddie pls tell me which star signs i can date im an Aries....

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 09:08

@ odie - I think most women cheat when things are not okay with our men. But I can't seem to take their (exes) hands out my cookie jar!

belz
05 Jun 2009 09:09

shame Odie.
4 partners u make me feel like a whore >> heyi Stroh, yazi nami ngiyamangala.

awelani
05 Jun 2009 09:10

LMBAO maddie,,

ingamane idliwe izintuthwane....Sixple LOL

JadaPinkett
05 Jun 2009 09:10

FoxyT.....Iesih gal this must b diffiult for u sana...........m still coming back with my advice

teev
05 Jun 2009 09:10

ha ha hayi maan Belz....akathakathiwe u FoxyT,

odie
05 Jun 2009 09:14

me i want to know if i qualify to be called that.. i am so bitter.

belz
05 Jun 2009 09:16

You are not odie, give yourself a break.

odie
05 Jun 2009 09:18

belz - why my dear. i am so hurt, i cried so much last nite.

Dangerous woman
05 Jun 2009 09:22

Now my ex is back in the picture and I’m cheating again. Am I wrong? I don’t love him much but the sex is great...............udlala ubufebe nje wena ntombazane and ke my sister don't worry uzalwe unje and ngeke washintsha I wonder seyingakanani imbobo yakho yokubhejwa bitch ndini!

teev
05 Jun 2009 09:23

but FoxyT u haven't answered Nonny, she asked if you want to freelance or you want a steady relationship...because I think if u can answer that I'll be able to advise u...

Strolicious
05 Jun 2009 09:23

Odie da day u count ur ex's ,1,2,3 nyt stand adlula all ur fingers even ur toes then umogwanthi

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 09:23

Does it make you a bitch when you have slept with many men or makes you a bitch when sleeping with more than one man at the same time? That's my question...

belz
05 Jun 2009 09:24

another thing odie, there are some things you dont confess love, like the sexual partner bit, at the moment when you confess, you feel like you are doing the right hting, like this person needs to know, kodwa grand grand you are digging your own hole, a woman needs to have secrets, that your partner dont have to know, kodwa uyasho nawe ukuthi he is an ex, he can take his opinions nje and shove them!!!

You are in a long distance relationship with your ex?? angiktholi kahle Ods. Kodwa nje in general, awukolodi muntu anything, no explanation, nothing, especially an ex.

Toodecent
05 Jun 2009 09:25

Guys I think some of you should go on easy with some words... We dont want to be seen as a sex forum..

Strolicious
05 Jun 2009 09:27

DW who r u 2 judge,listen sistas asithukani NXA

maddie
05 Jun 2009 09:29

eish le thomile la bona

@Foxy i know u and some bloggers might say this is crap and all but let me know after u've been in that relationship at least 6 months or a year

@strolicious

your best matches

Leo

Both you and Leo are fire signs, sharing similar life goals and interests. There is a good chance for a lasting relationship between you two, as long as there is plenty of excitement and romance. you both love the spotlight and enjoy adventure, and because you're both fire signs, there will be plenty of passion. You share an intense admiration for each that will help keep your love alive. In addition, the Leo’s faithfulness will fulfill your need for adoration from your partner, and Leo’s creativity, expressiveness and fun-loving nature will likely satisfy your need for activity.

Sagitarrius

This union can be one of the most dynamic and exciting duos in all the zodiac. Both of you are fire signs, and share a love of adventure and energy that knows no bounds. You communicate well, and the frankness of Sagittarius may be just what you need to control a sometimes out-of-control ego. Sagittarius is naturally optimistic, which resonates well with your own cheerful and upbeat outlook.

your good matches

Aquarius

Aquarius provides the freedom you need to feel independent, and isn’t intimidated by your sometimes domineering nature. you both share a common vision for the future, and understand each other on an intuitive level. you both love starting over and beginning new projects, so your time together will be full of adventure. you also know how to make each other laugh, and you will be impressed and inspired by Aquarius’ inventiveness and intelligence.

Gemini

You are both adventurous and ambitious, and your shared optimism will lead to an exciting and close-knit relationship. Gemini is adaptable enough to keep up with your unpredictable nature, and you will find Gemini to be sexy, exciting and intelligent. you both live for the moment, and so your relationship will be filled with excitement and spontaneity.you will have to keep the often unpredictable Gemini interested, but if that can be accomplished, Gemini will stay committed to the relationship.

the rest don't even try

Zah000
05 Jun 2009 09:29

It all depends on what you want. Do you want a steady relationship or as Nonny said: You want to freelance?? *lol @ this term* But i don't think stressing about the number of men you've slept with is gonna help. I think you should take time out to figure out exactly what it is that you want. It'll be easy to recognise it once it comes your way

Strolicious
05 Jun 2009 09:31

FoxyT both my skat.

Zah000
05 Jun 2009 09:32

True dat @ belz. Akuyona indaba yakhe leyo. Once you confess about izindlela zakho ezingalumgile, chances are he'll lose all respect he had for you........

zozoe
05 Jun 2009 09:33

Odie i feel your bitterness Nna My Ex Called A bitch(sefebe) for no reason just bcoz i didnt ansa ma once then when he called for second time i answerd it and he called me bitch Seven times I was angry as hell, how cud he? its not like he caught me with anybody and he was even sorry about it, i had to call it quits, but the sad part i miss him , i dont know guys shud i call him or what

felfel
05 Jun 2009 09:34

Odie i dont think anyone can decide whether ur a B! or not, if u feel like u are one becos of the things u've done then u probably are one but if u know that u are not becos of watever reasons then u probably are not one. He's probably a B! himself if he's had the same no. of partners u've had and yet judges you.

And like Belz said, somethings u just don't have to own up to, learn to have secrets, no number is normal to a man.

Lessie
05 Jun 2009 09:35

I always ask myself gore why are they doing this to their hubbies. i guess thats the way life is now. The q shud b why are we doing this to their hubbies?........Lol

Zah000
05 Jun 2009 09:35

@ zozoe: sthandwa lose this man

zozoe
05 Jun 2009 09:36

oops mistakes
<<i didnt ansa ma (phone)
he was even sorry about it, meant to say not sorry

odie
05 Jun 2009 09:40

me cant help cause i have the same problem.....
will read the response from bloggers

Katlegom
05 Jun 2009 09:43

@Lessie, why are doing this to your hubby vele?

these are the things that make me be reluctant to commit. my woman will do the same thing as these are other married do with me.

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 09:46

@ teev - I want a stable relationship but with a bit of freedom. I don't want to be treated as bomme ba gale (an old woman). I'm still young and wanna have some fun. Most men I meet are fun at first but they end up being serious too quickly and expect the same from me

odie
05 Jun 2009 09:52

i know this chick - she is 26, we were just chilling and laughing at things that we so so she took 2 A4 sheets and started writing the names of guys she has been involved with, when she turned the first pages and continued writing I just couldnt believe it.

Belz - i have learnd it the hard way no more confessing or telling secrets. NO MORE

TerryN
05 Jun 2009 09:57

Tazzy - i am Gemini and i admit i am a serious cheater.

odie...i know my ex partner was and i couldnt keep up...

Katlegom
05 Jun 2009 09:57

I want a stable relationship but with a bit of freedom. I don't want to be treated as bomme ba gale (an old woman). I'm still young and wanna have some fun. Most men I meet are fun at first but they end up being serious too quickly and expect the same from me
@Foxy T - please elaborate, so that i can be educated and know what women want(that's if they also know what they want LOL)

mana melita
05 Jun 2009 09:58

Maddie, I'm a capricon what am I like?

tizoz
05 Jun 2009 10:02

Now my ex is back in the picture and I’m cheating again. Am I wrong? I don’t love him much but the sex is great...............udlala ubufebe nje wena ntombazane and ke my sister don't worry uzalwe unje and ngeke washintsha I wonder seyingakanani imbobo yakho yokubhejwa bitch ndini!

this was so unnecessary!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dangerous woman
05 Jun 2009 10:09

So I have one question, am I a bitch or I don’t know what I want?.......Yes u r a bitch en u don't know wat u want Bicth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 10:11

@ Katlegom - I think its up each woman. You cant cook us in one pot (just came up with this one tl tl tl) There are those that want to be "woman of the house" and stay at home, looking after the hubby and the kids. But me on the other hand, I still want to go out, have fun, come back. That's all I need..is it too much? I just need my freedom

maddie
05 Jun 2009 10:17

But me on the other hand, I still want to go out, have fun, come back. That's all I need..is it too much? I just need my freedom

@foxy u sound more and more like a gemini plse give me ur birthdate

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 10:19

@ maddie - why would I lie about such a small thing? 21 February 19__

teev
05 Jun 2009 10:20

but sweety you need to set the terms and conditions from the word go, so that uma umfana ekushela azi kahle ukuthi wena u not the in-house typa kinda person... you know. But really I dont understand lendaba of going back to the ex.
it's good to have your freedom as well, but not with your body okay!! I dont think you are a b#t%h, ts just that u sometimes get tinned and when u get a chance to to be out if that can you misbehave.

dali
05 Jun 2009 10:22

i smell danger here....

Katlegom
05 Jun 2009 10:23

@ FoxyT, i had the feeling that the going out and have fun will come up, LOL. honestly speaking this is what makes most relationship have problems. we understand that you also need to have fun with your girls but when you moved in with your boyfriend or married you should cut down on coming home late coming from aboNews Cafe and Capello with Tshepiso, Naledi and Tshepiso's boyfriend's cousin.

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 10:25

@ teev - I'd like to put it this way...that I become wild if/when restricted! Is there anyone else like that?

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 10:29

@ Katlegom - I don't mind going out and coming back on time! The problem in my relationships is people who don't want me to go out all.

@ teev - I'm open with people from the start and I don't understand why they would want to change who you are. I believe in growing old together and *bleep!* but don't come into my life and wanna change it the way you see fit.

I think also that society as a whole have put some set of rules or standards for people who are in a serious relationship. to say that because you are in a certain stage in life, this is how you should act. That's just bull

maddie
05 Jun 2009 10:29

foxy i did not say u were lying doll, it's just ur characteristics fall more onto the side of a gemini

anyway enough about astrology, you should accept the way u r foxy.

there's nothing wrong with the way u feel and u will find someone who will not give u grief for who u r and as soon as u find ur soul mate u'll stop cheating.

people cheat bcos they're looking for completeness they cannot find in their current partners

teev
05 Jun 2009 10:32

its just natural FoxyT---its like reaching the teenage/puberty stage but you need to outgrow that. m with KG, when ethi you need to cut down kwezinye izinto. I think you should not allow noba ubani to restrict you.

myname
05 Jun 2009 10:37

No my skat u r not asking 2 much.

I believe each & every1 wants her/his freedom. Akere to make some1 happy; u have 2 b happy wena kuqala. So tell me how r u going 2 do that when u feel u cant breathe? We all need space im not saying we should break-up, cheat & come back but being out. Socialize with other people. Not ur husband or boyfreind. You know u committed with each other so why u make some1 feel lyk a prisoner.

Dont control ur partner akayiyo i remote.

When u luv some1, its something. When some1 luvs u back, its another thing. When u love the person who loves u back, its EVERYTHING......Some1 sent this sms yesterday 2 me.

TheLady
05 Jun 2009 10:48

odie-there's one thing a woman never does..is count the number of people you had one night stands with, booty called, been in a sexual relationship with, kissed and anything along those lines. And more importantly when a man asks you if you ever cheated on him-say NO, if current squeez asks how many ex's you have laugh it off-if you are pushed for a number DO NOT-I repeat do not go over 2 with your count...and stress that it was before you met him.

maddie
05 Jun 2009 10:49

When u luv some1, its something. When some1 luvs u back, its another thing. When u love the person who loves u back, its EVERYTHING......Some1 sent this sms yesterday 2 me.

couldn't agree more myname but then again if people were living according to this principle some song writers will be out of jobs

maud
05 Jun 2009 10:51

hayi man you cheat because you want to cheat ,it has nothing to do with your partner, and it does not mean your a bitch as long as you play safe.
you will pass that stage and you will settle down just like i did, did i? so i think

i think its better if you cheat while your still young and single than old and married.

myname
05 Jun 2009 11:06

we understand that you also need to have fun with your girls but when you moved in with your boyfriend or married you should cut down on coming home late coming from aboNews Cafe and Capello with Tshepiso, Naledi and Tshepiso's boyfriend's cousin.

But K sipping a coffee ko Mug & Bean whereas u know what u want is getting down koNews Cafe. Pretending 2 b some1 else whereas wena utsiba kere u r majaivane. She should finish what she is doing now then in time she will will into sense (i hope u will change though & im not saying uyahlanya).

Maar what i know is, no man wants his woman 2 b out ALONE, socializing with different guys, giving them her cell number & come back & say, "Baby he is my freind, Sbu & Derrick r my freinds. You know i will never hurt u. No man likes that even women. They dont buy that.

myname
05 Jun 2009 11:08

meant 2 say

...she will COME into sense (i hope u will change though & im not saying uyahlanya).

zaa
05 Jun 2009 11:09

<<<I don't mind going out and coming back on time! The problem in my relationships is people who don't want me to go out all.>>>

I feel u Foxy and i know it's emotionally draining to always have to argue about that. I'm in a relationship with a guy 14yrs my senior. We met when i was still on my break from alcohol and when that time was up he wasn't happy about it. He said that women who are drinking have no "dignity" and tend to be irresponsible. To cut the story short, he have issues with my drinking because he doesn't drink nor smoke. I told him he must just let me be who i am not be the person he wants me to be. He wants me to quit or only drink in his presence. I told him thats not going to happen anytime soon caz i don't imagine myself doing that. Another thing, he becomes too easily so there's no way i can take him with when i go out. He's coming from a religious background and none of his siblings drinks, he's trying too hard to impress his parents.

<<<I'd like to put it this way...that I become wild if/when restricted! Is there anyone else like that?>>>

Ya im like that and my advantage is that we in a long distance relationship and when he's not around I make sure gore i do all the the things that i won't be able to do in his presence to the maximum so that akesokole when he's around. BTW, im also a Pisces...26 Feb

zaa
05 Jun 2009 11:12

....another thing he becomes bored too easily.....

Toodecent
05 Jun 2009 11:21

utsiba>>> O itsi.

Toodecent
05 Jun 2009 11:24

I'm in a relationship with a guy 14yrs my senior.>>>> Bravo to you :-) I wanna hear more about this lol.

zaa
05 Jun 2009 11:28

What it is exactly that you want to hear TDC?

myname
05 Jun 2009 11:28

@TDC, Dankie Booofsssss, As from today, u tloba ke tutor yaka.

zaa
05 Jun 2009 11:29

meant to say: What is it....

Toodecent
05 Jun 2009 11:31

u tloba >>> o tloba
zaa niks, just like it nje lol.

odie
05 Jun 2009 11:33

@ Lady - thank you very much for the kgakololo e ntle eo. i am never ever thinking of that and altering that out. thanx.

therapy
05 Jun 2009 11:49

@ Foxy You are a bitch and you must be proud of it, thats a simple answer to your question babe

therapy
05 Jun 2009 11:50

a good one neh!

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 11:53

@ zaa - I think you and me understand each other better. Same star, same type of men who don't drink nor smoke. Although I hate men who smoke! But for them not to drink make them see only the bad side of drinking and in general, woman who drink and party.

tracy
05 Jun 2009 11:55

@maddie mina I m scorpion what is ma match

Back to the topic I dont think you are a bitch, but you dont know what you want and the good thing is you kno what you doing is wrong now think about why you left you ex and why you chose to live with you current man. Then face reality your ex at the moment thinks you are a bitch obviously he knows you with someone now and you sleeping with him. Unless you guys agreed to a no strings attached sex session then its cool but if you going back to him for a relationship think again.

belz
05 Jun 2009 12:06

myname, ndiyayikopa leyo sms. this friends with guy business is a problem for me, i dont want anyone telling me tht i cant be friends with guys, hayi ungubani wena. especially the ones ongthole nginabo, singamane shlukane mhlobo.

zaa
05 Jun 2009 12:09

TDC, o sale sharp le di battery di sa charger...hi hi hi

zaa
05 Jun 2009 12:12

Foxy i guess we'll just have to learn to live le baruti ba rena....*sigh*

Virtous
05 Jun 2009 12:27

you will pass that stage and you will settle down just like i did, did i? so i think
i think its better if you cheat while your still young and single than old and married.
Theres nothing 'better' about cheating wether you do it while you are married or in a relationship its still boils down to 1 thing. You do not trust or respect yourself to be true to 1 person.

Foxy T, I think you already know the answer to your own question, you are just looking for consolation from the bloggers.

Clearly you don't feel good about yourself after cheating, and ultimately you' re the one who lives with the consequences of your cheating escapades.

A woman who loves, respects her body and is self confident will not make excuses for cheating nor willingly make the same mistake twice.
Take it or leave it this is my personal opinion.

maud
05 Jun 2009 12:36

@Virtous- wether you like it or not its happening, leave with it love, it started with our grandparents, if you can change them join them.

i dont remember feeling guilty after cheating, i never said it was a mistake.

i dont regret anything i did in my past in fact my life its were i wanted it to be, by gods grace i must admit,

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 13:12

@ Virtious - I've never regreted cheating! Maybe it's because I've always been playing it safe, always. I believe its just in my nature to be looking for something new, something different, from time to time.

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 13:13

@ Virtious - I've never regreted cheating! Maybe it's because I've always been playing it safe, always. I believe its just in my nature to be looking for something new, something different, from time to time.

Cande
05 Jun 2009 13:35

utsiba>>> O itsi.>>>>>@ TDC "o itse" tlt ltlt llt

Toodecent
05 Jun 2009 13:39

lol ok Cande akere ke chuna dai polyphonic ya rona di tikilines wabo?

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 13:58

@ Cande -

utsiba>>> O itsi.>>>>>@ TDC "o itse" tlt ltlt llt - "o a tseba"

ngwana
05 Jun 2009 14:12

I think you may have Borderline Personality Disorder
google it, see if you can relate.

FoxyT
05 Jun 2009 14:20

@ ngwana - Wa hlanya straight! So you think I may have a "serious mental illness" like they put it ko google...never! Sex is sex, cheating is cheating, it has nothing to do with my mental health. O re ke a hlanya? That an insult tltltltlt

KK 2008
05 Jun 2009 16:27

LOL @ FoxyT...relax dear, ha o hlanye...It is normal and like someone has said before, be honest with yourself and your partner because there is nothing worse than suffocating in a relationship. How old are you if you don't mind me asking?

I went through this phase as well not so long ago..."played the field" and went with the flow and you know what, it was fun, safe and exciting and I have no regrets.By the time I was ready to "settle" as they call it, I did and I am glad I went through that phase because now I am commit ted and trust me, no man "shakes" or threatens my commitment to my fiance'. So, stop beating yourself up. Socialise, set the record straight with your STIFFLING BOYFRIEND and let him decide if he can handle you or let u go. If he carries on this way, he is the one o tlo hlanyang at the end of it all a lapisitse ke go go mathisa. The age gap between my hubby and I is 12 years. He was my first boyfriend from high school (took my virginity and all) but he allowed me to go through the "crazy phase" and it did not phase him at all. I remember after graduating and at my first job, he came in to check if I was ready to be his wife and found me still nowhere near ready, he took a step back and allowed me to experience life and when I got tired of it all, he allowed me to recollect myself and "find" myself and married me in a heartbeat when we both realised we cannot live without each other. Now we joke about it and he only tells me now that he knew all along what he was doing. He said he did not want to become an insecure Mandla Mthembu so he chose to allow me to grow, make mistakes, learn from them. He was always around the corner to catch me in case I fall. One thing I never made a mistake of was to expose him to my escapades. Sometimes he will find out about my latest conquest and he would laugh it off and tell my friends that I am his future wife and will be the mother of his children and those "conquests" are nothing but the right of passage for me. Mind u, it is because he has also played and he knew what he was talking about and to this day, he is the only man who can "handle" me.

So stop stressing.Be safe...CONDOMISE and just allow yourself to find your path.

Pooky
05 Jun 2009 16:31

wha a clever man

Pooky
05 Jun 2009 16:32

what a clever man

belz
05 Jun 2009 16:37

WOW KK!!!!!!!!!!!!

myname
05 Jun 2009 16:44

No KK my 1st bf is the 1 who sent me this sms..When u luv some1, its something. When some1 luvs u back, its another thing. When u love the person who loves u back, its EVERYTHING......Some1 sent this sms yesterday 2 me.

He is the 1st bf from ekhaya & believe me, he is patient. He still call me & he always tell me i would b his wife. Mind u when i was pregnant (not his child) he told me that, he doesnt mind noba i can have more kids, he will always luv me & i will marry him.

Oh God! I think i should stop playing coz he told me that when im ready 4 him, i should tell him. Guys akapheli mandla lo mfana.

Hai im gonna change no wonder im boyfreindless nc nc nc. My man is waiting 4 me.

Bloggers bye bye. Take care of ur men & men take care of ur ladies.

Foxxy
05 Jun 2009 18:57

Eish, this is so wierd coz this article totally sounds like it was written from someone inside my head... Exactly like me.

Phikza
05 Jun 2009 21:14

WOW, KK! ditto belz...that is just wonderful man

FoxyT
08 Jun 2009 07:24

@ Foxxy - I think we are alike, don't you think....even came up with names which are more the same! I'm glad some people are going through or went through the same *bleep!* like KK.

@ KK - I'm 25

VusiK
29 Jun 2009 23:46

You sound like my "out the door ... going going gone! woman
Same Age group Say you got a good man, but .....
Very familiar ... Perhaps there's an airborne bug going about ...
I do suggest you look inside yourself. you seem to have a hole in your sole, a hunger that is difficult to fulfill, and a thirst you cannot slake.
Any abandonment issues in your past? Daddy died when you were young and needed him/her most? .. or simply an unceremonious exit that left a void .. then reappeared in your life?
I detect a void in what you write. Only a psychiatrist can help if that's the case.
Your case is extremely similar to mine ... Hmmmm!!!!
Are you sure the age gap is 14, and not 18 years?

VusiK
29 Jun 2009 23:49

LOL .... Just Messing with you Foxy ....
I don't think you're a B*tch ... I just think you have a void.

tshepiso
25 Mar 2010 11:43

haibo? i miss a lot

Tshilo
25 Mar 2010 12:36

me too

Simomavuso@vodamail.co.za
23 May 2010 22:21

not sure but follow your heart the future is yoz

charmagal
06 Dec 2010 09:46

thnks so mch foxy t for bringng this up i thnk ive got da sme prob here i brke up wth ma ex but we ve turned into sex partners and i really like it i smetyms miss him even if im wth ma cbf is this normal?the guy has moved on and so am i and for god s sake ma ex s gal is preggie but am busywth her man

flowy
07 Mar 2011 09:51

Some gal r but it'z gotta depend on wat u rili lukn 4 in a guy

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