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Incredible Love Connection

Written by Matswakable from the blog Story of my life on 13 Aug 2009
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Of lately it has become a mission to meet someone the conventianal way and exchange numbers.  I have resorted to online dating simply because there you get to meet a lot of different people, with the same purpose - finding love.  A day, you get close to 10 people interested in your profile.  However, conventionally, it is difficult to meet even 1 person, showing an interest.  Also, with online dating, you get to filter through their profiles and keeps those who meet your criteria. 

Background 


Last night I went to bed wondering about a whole lot of things. In fact – I am lying, it was just one thing. Finding love online. I have been doing this for some time now and the guys I meet are just nje. Probably you are asking yourself what is just nje. I will break it down for you. I know I’m not the most beautiful woman on earth but still, I am no Shrek. I still look like a woman. In terms of my body weight, I believe that I am over average to put it mildly. One can turn around and say that weight is something that can be worked on and I fully agree. The challenge is that, how do you work on a 98kg weight. This is what I am good at online – picking up guys who are 98kg and above. These guys, you can see ukuthi baphethwe isifo so shukela.

Secondly, they say ubuhle bendoda zikomo zakhe. True that, however, I seem to be meeting guys who are 98kg, and not looking after themselves. There is no ugly person on earth. You choose to be ugly. There is a lot available in the market to assist in that department. Yes, I don’t expect guys to be putting on makeup and all, but at least make up for your shortcomings. Look after yourself, be clean, manicured and be in touch with the latest trends. Don’t overdo it like Bheki Cele. So what is the point of having a healthy wallet and still look like indlala yodwa? I don’t want anyone’s money, I want us to work for OUR money and spend OUR money.

Case 1. One guy sent me a picture wearing a leather coat in summer. I asked him, where was this now – guess what? He was attending a wedding. I mean really. Black leather coat at a wedding – isinyama sodwa.

Case 2. I have met a 45 year old good looking man, well built and he said all the right things. I said to myself “Thank God, my prayers have been answered”. Only to find that they were partly answered. He invited me for lunch one day. He actually gave me his address to meet him at his place and we could drive together. To me, that was not a good move, but after debating with my mind, I eventually found myself outside his house flat. I know we achieve things in different stages of our lives, others take some time to get there. Mara, haai man, a 45 year old man living in a flat on top of a bottle store, in the most dingiest places next to a train station, is a NO for me. It does not end there. I called him to let him know that I’m outside. I was no longer comfortable living my car there and I asked him to follow me or vice versa to our lunch place. He does not have a car – no, he can’t drive. So we ended driving there together in my car. To cut the long story short, I ended up footing our lunch bill as well (by the way, it was less than R200.00). Oh, I found out later that he lied about being an accountant. He is a debtors clerk.

Probably you are saying this woman is full of kak. No, I’m not. I have met a man who I thought was better than the 2 above until he said something.

Case 3. He looked good, dressed well, doctor by profession and knew how to treat a lady, well I thought. For our first meeting, he organised a picnic lunch for us at Irene Country lodge in PTA. This was our first meeting after chatting online and exchanging contact numbers. 2 hours later at our picnic spot, he threw a hand grenade at me. “I have an erection”!!! Wow – that took me by surprise and I thought to myself, this is not what I’m looking for. And for that matter, why use medical terms? mfm
I don’t want s*x, but a relationship. S*x will come later.

Now having read about my not so nice experiences you must be wondering what does all this have to do with you. Well, this is where you come in. I need your honest answer in terms of what you are looking for. Please break it down. Don’t leave any stone unturned. Don’t hold anything back. Critique me. I need to know so at least I know what guys look at. By the way, the truth won’t break me but will only make me stronger and a better person.

Am I nuts? Does this online dating thing work? What type of people use these services?.

Have you met strange / normal people online? What do you look at?



142 Comments

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 11:53

Ok, lets hear it. 

Renegade
13 Aug 2009 12:02

Kwkwakwakwa!!

Guy 1: Black leather coat at a wedding – isinyama sodwa.
Guy 2: Mara, haai man, a 45 year old man living in a flat on top of a bottle store, in the most dingiest places next to a train station
Guy3: I have an erection

I had no problems with online dating although i've never tried it, but after reading those 3 cases, hai ngeke! Never!

Savanah Dry
13 Aug 2009 12:08

kkkkkkkkkkkkkkk hihijihi okay sorry about your experiences Girl, but online dating you are bound to meet weirdos there and a few good ones will come back with my experience

Toodecent
13 Aug 2009 12:10

LMAO... yah neh?
Mina I dont have issues with online dating, its probably the advanced boy meet girl kinda thing that happened in the olden days... Good luck with finding a man online and just maybe think about what impresses you and if that is ok to be looking for such and only that.

Mathaz
13 Aug 2009 12:13

Your stories are so funny.....the things we g o through for love.  

Mara, haai man, a 45 year old man living in a flat on top of a bottle store, in the most dingiest places next to a train station, This is a sure sign that he was lying about his profession, I would have left without letting him know that i was outside.

Clearly you have not met someone who is serious about you online and i have not tried, I guess you should go out more often and try to mingle with people offline.

myname
13 Aug 2009 12:18

shame ngwana but LOL

My mum always say, "Indoda iyathandazelwa" so nam ndithi give ur knees ukudla kwalo sana.

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 12:22

@ Sav - it looks like the site has more weirdos than good ones.

@ Mathaz, have tried that.  I've been introduced to people and it did not work.  2 Sundays ago I met one at Melrose Arch - we were having lunch with friends and he decided to join us.  He showed an interest in me, refused to give him my number but recorded his, with the aim of calling him during the ween. And when it was time to leave, I saw him getting into his Camry.  Hau bantu, kanti yini?

Funny enough, there is this little voice in me that says. hold on, you are almost there.

Toodecent
13 Aug 2009 12:25

Mara the problem with women at times is that you have your own expectations before you even meet the person and when you finally see them you get turned off he second you look into their eyes...tl tl tl. I have seen it happen with me before, people turn to think you something else you not just from what you do or what they saw...mara eish your stories are cracking me up..

Sanah
13 Aug 2009 12:34

lmao, bt askies gal for meeting all these weirdos.


I have an erection”!!! Wow – that took me by surprise and I thought to myself, this is not what I’m looking for. And for that matter, why use medical terms? mfm lmao @ the medical term.

mna i dont have any problem with online dating. i havent tried it but been thinking abt going online but im still lil bit scared. 

with regards to what you expect from these man, doesnt matter if your FIONA (shreks wife) or a babydoll. we all have our list and if the guys you meet dont have many ticks on your list gal, dont bother yourself with them. 

what also helps in finding love is joining a class or something, do some dancing, jogging in the morning, the gym, i meet at lot of people at book stores mna.

faraimagic
13 Aug 2009 12:35

Interesting!

faraimagic
13 Aug 2009 12:36

anyway let me read this .....................

GML
13 Aug 2009 12:41

WEll.

I honestly think that the doctor gy was probably testing trying to see how open to ideas you are. And maybe how you handle yourself in sticky situations. If he was a gentle man like you said then maybe the fault lies with you.

You may say that you are not picky but you may be subconsciously.

Maybe the problem is that you expect them to say the right things at the right time. When in fact they are saying things that they feel are right and appropriate at that time. Nobody is perfect but you seem to be looking for Mr 100%

myname
13 Aug 2009 12:42

Maar my luv maybe u should give up your check list.......maybe they r not so bad bt wena u busy looking for ur Mr Perfect kanti nawe u r not Ms Perfect......Maybe ur man doesnt have abs or driving 5 series...

Manthaka
13 Aug 2009 12:42

LOL at the 3rd guy. shame man...
my believe and experiences is that we all have needs and wants when coming to the choice of men. the needs you cant live without and I believe the wants you can compromise.
like with the one at Melrose Arch- u were turned off by the car. maybe he has another car; or maybe you can teach him one or two things
I always heard gore "monna o hlatswa ke mosadi" when I grew up

you always here people bare "ke mothotse a apara brentwood; o itsi go apara kanna"
Not everybody is lucky to meet the man who has 90 to 100% needs. there are things that you teach a person.

felfel
13 Aug 2009 12:45

I've tried it but i don't meet the guy after 1 month, i wait longer and just let things flow, i've had good relatins with online guys, omnye we get along very well and we've been cyber chatting & calling for over 2 years now.

Abanye  we met after a long time and dated and it was great and i'm good friends with them now.

myname
13 Aug 2009 12:49

Iyooo sorry GML

Katlegom
13 Aug 2009 12:50

a 45 year old man living in a flat on top of a bottle store, in the most dingiest places next to a train station, is a NO for me. 
couldnt have said it better myself, that is a no no!

I ended up footing our lunch bill as well (by the way, it was less than R200.00). 
i find this hard to believe, when the bill came he just pretended he didnt see it. why did you do do the same too, or you should have left him there and go becasue by that moment you knew that he was not a right person for you

“I have an erection”!!!



Katlegom
13 Aug 2009 12:52

I have an erection”!!! 
kwa kwa kwa kwa!
this guy is so imature

Dasha
13 Aug 2009 12:53

Funny enough, there is this little voice in me that says. hold on, you are almost there.

Girl lemme tell you, you are. Just hold on. I was feeling like you last week and today oh my goodness, I'm over the moon. I felt as though love was not meant for me and just as i was feeling like that, He just showed up (literally). I was hosting some few friends at my place on saturday and when they said i should open for someone at the gate I was like fu**en gate crushers! But when he entered the room, I froze, he froze, it was so obvious that my girl friends saw that i was falling apart. It was definitely love at fist sight.

@TDC Mara the problem with women at times is that you have your own expectations before you even meet the person and when you finally see them you get turned off he second you look into their eyes...tl tl tl.
I had my expectations alright, but because I had already given up (thanx to you), I loved everything about him the minute i saw him. I didn't know what he does for a living, he's not a "hunk" but there was just something about him that drew me to him. The funny part when I accompanied him to his car, I had to ask him what he does for a leaving. He was driving a city golf. When he told me what he does for a leaving I was like pheewww!!! Anyway he came for dinner last night in his merc so yeah I think I found him.



awelani
13 Aug 2009 12:53

LMAO @ ur stories,

Savanah Dry
13 Aug 2009 12:53

@ Matswa  they say you have to kiss plenty of frogs before u find your prince 

dali
13 Aug 2009 12:54

lmao....... i wanna try this too!

maud
13 Aug 2009 12:54

hayi ke  mina sorry asoze,what if i meet a serial killer, i belive if you want to meet someone go to the mall ,attend parties(invited off cause) at  the gym you will never go wrong, my question is what is that is wrong with that person that he resolved in internet dating .

Toodecent
13 Aug 2009 12:54

I had my expectations alright, but because I had already given up (thanx to you), I loved everything about him the minute i saw him.>>> 
Ke chunne eng nna jaanong?

GML
13 Aug 2009 12:56

@myname: what you apologising for?

i honestly think that we expect men to have all these qualities that we want them to have but once a man has his expectations (like cooking, cleaning etc) we get all "he aint right for me".

i'm not saying that they right or wrong with having those kind of expectations. But if you have an expectation that a man must drive a nice car, why cant he have an expectation that his woman should be able to cook?
Our expectations differ from those of the male species. And the sooner women and men learn that the easier it going to be to live together.

Dasha
13 Aug 2009 12:57

leaving = living

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 13:01

Bloggers - thanks for your replies.  Some of you have posed questions and some made comments.

To those who commented about check list.  Look at my check list and see if there is anything wrong with it.

1. Looks – not looking for a Boris Kodjoe but definitely not uShrek – looking for an average man.
2. Bodywise - not a 98kg. I weigh 69kg.  I am not looking abs or anything. 
3. Education, he necessarily does not have to be a Professor but with a level of education which somehow not a step far from each other; I have a masters degree
4. Achievements : I am not a wealthy woman or anything near that but I am working very hard in realising that dream. I have a roof over my heard that is just big enough. I have a car though not top of the range, however it suits my lifestyle. I am a professional and work hard therefore I don’t expect him to be a Mandla Mthembu / Mashobane but I don’t want a modidi (church mouse).
5. General knowledge of things, need not be on the same page but not many pages apart;
6. Similarities, we need not to be twins but also not poles apart;


Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 13:09

@ Manthaka: like with the one at Melrose Arch- u were turned off by the car. maybe he has another car;

You are so right.  i did not give him a chance.  I just looked at the car, and I quickly drew my conclusion.  Anyway, maybe I should give him a call, I still have his number.

If you look at my check list - I left out keeping abreast with the trend on purpose, as I believe that yes, o ka mohlatsoa.  So it is not so important to me.

sjura
13 Aug 2009 13:12

U have a master's degree,does ths mean he must have a PHD or ku shap noba yi degree o diploma?

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 13:12

@ Maud : my question is what is that is wrong with that person that he resolved in internet dating .

Might be for the same reasons as mine - not found love the conventional way.  I have mentioned those reasons at the begining of this article.

GML
13 Aug 2009 13:13

Why must you have a list?

Why not just say God when you think i'm ready please provide me with a man that you have picked for me.

Why must you look? A man will find you when the time is right. the problem is that women take themselves to men. you must remember that God made Eve from Adams rib and when he was done creating her. He took her to adam and woke Adam up. Adam woke up to a beautiful woman
Eve did not take herself to Adam but God did. So let God take you there and forget about the list

Smilo
13 Aug 2009 13:17

The problem is your list, you carry it with ou all the time.
Throw it away,  Be friends with them, learn who they are.

TKSM
13 Aug 2009 13:17

@GML

WEll.

I honestly think that the doctor gy was probably testing trying to see how open to ideas you are. And maybe how you handle yourself in sticky situations. If he was a gentle man like you said then maybe the fault lies with you.

You may say that you are not picky but you may be subconsciously.

Maybe the problem is that you expect them to say the right things at the right time. When in fact they are saying things that they feel are right and appropriate at that time. Nobody is perfect but you seem to be looking for Mr 100%

TJO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mathaz
13 Aug 2009 13:21

@GML of all the responses that you post on TVSA, i must say this one is the best.  You have nailed it.

Sslave
13 Aug 2009 13:23

I also don't have a problem with internet dating and I've tried it but it was just out of curiosity. I think you are on the right path and you will meet Mr right soon. Good luck.

About the list, I understand that you want someone who will complement you and I think it is very unfair to say you should compromise. Your list is quite reasonable.

GML
13 Aug 2009 13:25

What now? TKSM. What have i done?

sjura
13 Aug 2009 13:27

Usazojola nale list yako if u dnt throw it away fast....i used carry a list with me all the time and i wud meet amadoda amaningi bt bcoz of the list i would go beck carrying it and with no man.

Zazacious
13 Aug 2009 13:28

Eish gal very unfortunate situations but online dating is  just not on, thats why you meeting so much weirdos. (I swear m not judging) But I agree with GML, it will happen when it does just pray nje wena qha. In anyway God probably sees something that you cant see. You might not even be ready for a relationship and only God knows when you will be. I STILL BLV THAT FOR EVERY ADAM THERE WAS AN EVE AND SO IT SHALL BE FOR US THEIR DESCENDANTS. AMEN
So just be patient gal, you will know when you ready

Katlegom
13 Aug 2009 13:29

U have a master's degree,does ths mean he must have a PHD or ku shap noba yi degree o diploma?
@sjura which PHD are you talking about, Pretty Huge Dig?

2good4u
13 Aug 2009 13:31

gal the lord has created a man especially for you. he has all the qualities u desire and more, u can try so hard to find him yourself bt when the time comes he will drop from the sky to your door step...all i can say is good luck

felfel
13 Aug 2009 13:32

It also matters as to which sites u join to meet these cyber men, if u on mxit u 'l find mxit kinda men (or rather boys), lol

Savanah Dry
13 Aug 2009 13:35

I dont see anything wrong with you having a list a woman's gotta have standards 
But leave leave to get to know the person before you use the list you never know someone is just trying to see if you want then for what they have or for who they are.

I have tried internet dating and i met my current boyfriend through there he is a God fearing men who just had problems meeting girls like i did meeting guys so its not all Bad like i said i had my own fair share of Frogs. 
But be open minded second dates normally do the trick dont judge according to the first meeting..

TKSM
13 Aug 2009 13:36

I dont think that poor Author is looking for (literally Mr 100% ) but for Mr appropriate, mr acceptable you know what i mean.  To be sitting on a first date and a guy says I have an erection.....what do you want me to scratch you penis for you...what are you implying...you want to see how open to ideas am i? is that it.....hahahahaha  i don't think so....c'mon now lets be real......

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 13:37

@ sjura : he can have a diploma as long as he’s got potential. As mentioned, we achieve different things at different stages of our lives. Not because I have a master’s degree, everyone must have one. 

@ GML – it is so true. Question though? Do I have that kind of faith? Let’s say the man that stays above the bottle store is the one, don’t you think that we will be fighting over finances? I thought men should be providers? In his case, I will have to take the male role in the relationship. 

@Smilo – what is wrong with carrying it? Are those things not reasonable / attainable? What happened to have an ideal man in mind?
Usazojola nale list yako if u dnt throw it away fast. kwa kwa kwa . lol

Best-Achiever
13 Aug 2009 13:41

"A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ, that a man should have to seek Him first to find her" ... i learn that from Nonny and it is very very true 

Sslave
13 Aug 2009 13:44

the man that stays above the bottle store this sounds so funny, tltltltltl. soring hle!

Mafresh
13 Aug 2009 13:45

Tswaki.. when it comes to your future DO NOT COMPROMISE. Always go for what u want, it might take a while but with patience you'll find it.

GML
13 Aug 2009 13:47

No TKSM. May be the conversation she had with him suggested that she is omfortable to talking about such things. It's the non verbal cues that do the most talking. Yes, it was inappropriate for him to say that. but maybe the way she answered the question could have meant a totally different thing. Maybe he wanted to find out if she's a whore who is willing to shag a Doctor on the first date.

Remember that they were cyber chatting before they met and maybe she gave him the impression that she is that sort of a girl. i would have asked him exactly what the purpose of the meeting was. To get a shag ot to meet a potential partner.

Being straight and forward with a man will mean he knows and understands that there is no playing thats going to take place with her. You dont find Mr appropriate or Mr acceptable. Acceptable to whom? Relationships are about compromise and sacrifice. Go will not give you everything. He will get you to a place of a Masters and still give you a "good" man that you deem to be acceptable. he will give you what he thinks is right for you. until such a time she realises that men come with different characteristics she wont find an appropriate man. We need to live with the good and the bad that men and women have. She has to make the most of the good that the men have and learn to accept the bad that comes with it. (not murder or rape pls)

BigMama
13 Aug 2009 13:48

@GML...........Have you tried challenging Sis Dolly??????

felfel
13 Aug 2009 13:50

regarding the list, theres nothing wrong with having certain standards/criteria/specifications as to who u let into ur life, i have my mental list and it works for me and thats why i have had the relations with the wonderful men i've dated. Men have their mental list too, when they meet u, they already tick as whether u'd make a great wifey or a great shag, and whether ur toes are cute enough for u to be invited to meet his buddies at the beach next week.lol

As to how u use ur 'list' is up to u, some people are paranoid about meeting men who fit the entire bill, it don't work like that, even a drawing artist has to rub off here and there to draw his masterpiece. Be open minded even though u know ur specifications, u don't need every species of Tom, Dick & Harry rubbing up on u.

Sslave
13 Aug 2009 13:51

Tswaki.. when it comes to your future DO NOT COMPROMISE. Always go for what u want, it might take a while but with patience you'll find it.

Couldn't have said/typed it better Mafreshy! True

Loreal
13 Aug 2009 13:51

Black leather coat at a wedding – isinyama sodwa. LOL kuleyondawo

2good4u
13 Aug 2009 13:51

@best-achiever: that is so true

sjura
13 Aug 2009 13:52

Sies Katlegom! Was talking about the one u get frm varsity not in one's list!

Sslave
13 Aug 2009 13:56

Amen felfel

GML
13 Aug 2009 13:57

@Matswakable: I am not saying you should accept a man who obviously does not have an interest in bettering himself. I'm saying that you have your standards and by all means try to find as close as possible to them. However the moment you start ticking off the list from the word go without getting to know them first,  you wont get anywhere. Like appearance for instance. If you dont like the way he is there is gym for that. You can sign both of you guys up and exercise together. Certain things can be changed or modified. And if a man loves you he will want to change for you, but you shouldnt force the change.

What I'm saying is you can find a man who is not Book educated but is extremely intelligent and smart and good looking. Does that mean he is not a good man because he doesnt have that paper that says certificate or diploma? Women make the men better. You could assist in making him better by helping him educate himself. It's about compromise and living with flaws and making the most of the good

sjura
13 Aug 2009 13:57

Why niti abanye abantwana ngo FROGGIE?

TKSM
13 Aug 2009 14:06

LOL!!!  Bigmama i feel you girl.....
But on the real GML I feel you too...i hear where you are coming from....okay i cant type for any longer than this...i have to go pea!!!!!!!!tjeer these diets.....i didn't know that i had to drink atleast two litres of water daily...tjo.......i am sure my bladder is shocketed!!!! :-)...will be back!

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 14:07

@GML - what you are saying up there, I have already covered.

In terms of my body weight, I believe that I am over average to put it mildly. One can turn around and say that weight is something that can be worked on and I fully agree. The challenge is that, how do you work on a 98kg weight.

he can have a diploma as long as he’s got potential. As mentioned, we achieve different things at different stages of our lives. Not because I have a master’s degree, everyone must have one too.

By the way. I usually take like 6 weeks chatting to them before meeting them in person.

But wa leather jacket entsho yena - I stopped chatting to him after seeing his picture.  Eish he was Nigerian and when I told him that, I am not interested in carrying on with the conversation, he answer was in a Nigerian accent  "Fok off.  You are not hot yoself"

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 14:10

@ felfel - the site is Southafricancupid.com - I want to believe that it is reputable.

JadaPinkett
13 Aug 2009 14:11

Tjo! Matswakabele............. talkin from the experience...................these dating site thing don't last u must only do it for fun................mina i once met a guy there en only to find out that m not the only kuyena coz i met his galfrnd khona kwi dating site which was very shocking en i was like oh owk but ke mina i was bored en ngangizikhumbulele ukiss coz my boyfrnd lives far from me so i met en he was gud looking en charming.

Best-Achiever
13 Aug 2009 14:12

"Fok off. You are not hot yoself"

kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa

TKSM
13 Aug 2009 14:20

back to the topic at hand.....
I just don't do online dating...people chat for different reasons....some might be serial killers..

and just because the probability of potentially hooking up with killers is there ,,,i will not take that risk.  I am great believer of murphy's law......If anything can go wrong.....hmmm then it will go wrong.

felfel
13 Aug 2009 14:21

JadaPinkett
13 Aug 2009 14:23

Anyway

JadaPinkett
13 Aug 2009 14:23

Anyway no

JadaPinkett
13 Aug 2009 14:24

anyway no more uukuthi ngidate umuntu engingazi coz umdlalo ongasile ............i jst don lyk it.

GML
13 Aug 2009 14:24

Lol Matswakable: I just think you need to think less about finding a man and go out party, dance, club, cooking classes. Do anything. A man will not know where to find you if you dont go out. You will find someone but dont focus on it too much.

zozoe
13 Aug 2009 14:24

happy are you Dasha 
finally you got your 2bob

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 14:26

@ BA - this is not a laughing matter - I was traumatised.

Here is his full response.

e he - Okay, now you tink dat you are pretty.  mchfm 
Fok off, You ar not so hot yoself.
Infuct - you are ogly
Very, very ogly
Go now-o - go look for yo prince charming.  Und, I am telling you dat, you will not find him-o. 

We shall see - Und, when you don't find him, you cun kom buck to me.  You will find me here, where you left me. Sauti Ho

awelani
13 Aug 2009 14:27

"Fok off. You are not hot yoself">>LMAO!!

Lela
13 Aug 2009 14:27

Sorry to be off topic guys, asisakhonzi na ndabona ngathi inkonzo ayide ingene kwelacala?

awelani
13 Aug 2009 14:29

LMBAO @ ur lagos almost boyfrend, kwakwakwakwakwakwa @ sauti ho!!, Sipxle LOL

Best-Achiever
13 Aug 2009 14:29

e he - Okay, now you tink dat you are pretty. mchfm
Fok off, You ar not so hot yoself.
Infuct - you are ogly
Very, very ogly
Go now-o - go look for yo prince charming. Und, I am telling you dat, you will not find him-o.

We shall see - Und, when you don't find him, you cun kom buck to me. You will find me here, where you left me. Sauti Ho

kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa 
tl tl tlt tl t lt lt lt ltl tltltltltl

YOU SHALL GO AND FIND IT .. NIZOHAMBA NIKUTHOLA  hahahahahahaha

Firstdvd
13 Aug 2009 14:36

OMW...his response!

sponono
13 Aug 2009 14:38

"cyberdating couple's first meeting went like this

man "I have an erection"

woman: "hey I want a relationship sex later"

Man" Fuk off. You are not hot yoself"

LOL LOL LOL LOL

awelani
13 Aug 2009 14:40

LMBAO @ Sponono, hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi

awelani
13 Aug 2009 14:40

Hi Spopo en happy b/lated b/day**waving**

Ms. Jay
13 Aug 2009 14:42

By the way. I usually take like 6 weeks chatting to them before meeting them in person.

hahahahhaahah I dont believe this,

BTW how old are you M?

Did you know that pple lie in cyberland!?

its easy to type something you are not..... bakithi I don believe this - I agree with GML,
Gal....
You just cant allow anywho's into your life for the sake of finding love esp over the internet....heylllllo you can meet a serial killer on here and "fall" in love with the image he potrays.....fo sho uJesu uyeza!

Green.arrow
13 Aug 2009 14:43

....hectic staff.....4 which im clueless...

"A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ, that a man should have to seek Him first to find her" ... i learn that from Nonny and it is very very true
....
yoh!....im owning this one....
....aaaaand b4 i finished typing this out...i have been presented an opportunity to practice it....yah ne...i dunno whether ke Modimo or sathane...

sponono
13 Aug 2009 14:44

so do you guys pay for dating on-line  (i know some that require credit card payments etc)  are they all like that...give me one to sample FOR FREE...then later I can join the ones you pay for..

and to the author of the article, you shulda-given the "erection" guy a chance, coz he was just very straight foward and honest, and you could have shown him that there's more to life than just sex...theres more sex and everything else...

so dont give up in fact throw away that list..OK  go with the flow

Ms. Jay
13 Aug 2009 14:44

LOL sponono........

felfel
13 Aug 2009 14:46

LMFBAO @ Spopo

sponono
13 Aug 2009 14:49

Awelani..thanks a gazillion, saw yo message yesterday..though i didnt do nothin yesterday...will be doin lots this weekend...the only pleasure I had yesterday was the consolation that I'm still considered a youth according to the age bracket....LOL  so am not yet what they call me  "ankela- or marazo"   !!!dang these kids 

so to be off pic

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 14:50

@ Ms. Jay By the way. I usually take like 6 weeks chatting to them before meeting them in person.

hahahahhaahah I dont believe this, This is the truth.  Why should I lie?
BTW how old are you M?  34 yrs old

Did you know that pple lie in cyberland!? Yes, very much.  Guy number 2 is the perfect example - accountant (debtors clerk).

its easy to type something you are not..... bakithi I don believe this - I agree with GML,

Smilo
13 Aug 2009 14:51

@Smilo – what is wrong with carrying it? Are those things not reasonable / attainable? What happened to have an ideal man in mind? 
@Matswakable- it is not wrong... you said you met someone at Melrose Arch and just because he was driving a Camry he is not the one you want, only because of the car he was driving then.
To me it sounds like you meet/see someone first time then you go to your list and check if he has what you want without getting to know the person... Inkinga ke yile list yakho ohamba nayo....

Best-Achiever
13 Aug 2009 14:51

....aaaaand b4 i finished typing this out...i have been presented an opportunity to practice it....yah ne...i dunno whether ke Modimo or sathane...

LOL GA ... well with it, you will never go wrong

felfel
13 Aug 2009 14:53

Spopo there are free ones, u can google them urself, i think the pay ones probably have much more decent and perhaps sincere people becos of the payment effort.  

6 weeks is too short a time for me to meet someone from cyberland, and it shows that u are there to look for something serious, online dating is a hobby for me which is why i can go for months to a year  or more cyber chatting to someone and getting to know them cos its merely a hobby and if it blossoms then that depends on the connection we make while chatting.

Strolicious
13 Aug 2009 14:55

e he - Okay, now you tink dat you are pretty. mchfm
Fok off, You ar not so hot yoself.
Infuct - you are ogly
Very, very ogly
Go now-o - go look for yo prince charming. Und, I am telling you dat, you will not find him-o.

We shall see - Und, when you don't find him, you cun kom buck to me. You will find me here, where you left me. Sauti Ho 


kwa kwa kwa ...tli tli tli ,,,,,ROTFLMBSAOTIPAL...classic

mathata
13 Aug 2009 14:56

im looking for a men ...Sowetan news paper, i was areal devil ,Yes i was looking for love but i endup doing Masepa.

To cut the story short.. dont hurt yourself with online thing.there is more to that

Bcs i was receiving more letters ... hm .. i started to do 1+ 7,guess what? i was connected to many guys,my thing was OK ... i will meet 10 guys a mns,n i will ask for transport money from them,at the end of the month i have R1200 as a student.

My last straw i have n affair with this guy From Natal,his room .. Shembe on the walls,poster,everything that wrote Shembe..lord has mersoooo,i was a drug to this guy,i will travel to  Orange groove to collect some $ every F* month end..shame nothing...

This guy Pee,i mean pee on the bed,worse part he left me in his room(MADAM house)the puppy bug like nobodys business on the door,until they call the cops they thought maybe someone is dead.

that guy was something else he was always drunk,at night i will sneak  to his trouser n monya the money.

At this moment i think he hates online dating bcs of me,

it works but not 100%

So guys sometimes it work but if you meet a bitcjwa ..bad luck,

realist
13 Aug 2009 14:57

1. Looks
2. Bodywise –
3. Education,
4. Achievements :
5. General knowledge
6. Similarities,

Of the above list you forgot the most important point:
What are your hobbies?
That normally determines whether your relationship will fly or needs some tweaking there and there or is just not worth it.

Btw, you also need to be streetwise; education alone is not going to deliver your ideal man. What you have mentioned above is when the relationship is sort of solid and you start thinking long term. Before I forget, are you in the twenties, thirties or forties?

Strolicious
13 Aug 2009 14:59

love will fnd u dnt look for it,....if some1 already said ths word askies blockers ,i ddnt read ama reply.

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 15:00

@sponono - www.southafricancupid.com

Registration is free and your profile can be viewed by all and you can also view their profiles.  This is called standard membership.  With the standard membership, you can only chat , send mail to Gold or Platinum memberrs only.  So basically, you can be on standard membership for a long time and carry on chatting with gold and platinum members.

Give the erection guy a chance - well, Im glad I did not.  A week later he called very early in the morning asking me not to use that number again. He should have never said that. I called the number, a lady answered, asked to speak to him, the woman sweared and put the phone down.

Thanks to google and Home Affairs - Check your marital status.  Googled the bugger - came up with his id number - checked his marital status - USHADILE.

Ms. Jay
13 Aug 2009 15:02

shame M, i can now understand your frustration 34years old and only a few good years left to enjoy real love.....you mean to say that 20 out of those 34 you didn meet @ least one guy that did it for you? were you married b4 or in a relationship that didn work out hence the need to try the internet?

What were you doing b4 you tried the internet that failed to work for you?

felfel
13 Aug 2009 15:03

considering ur age, i kinda understand then Matswakabele, ukuthi maybe u have a bit of impatience and not willing to date for fun, u want the real deal to settle down with, i can't help u there. Otherwise, go out, take care of urself and ul meet someone, be visible. even ask friends to hook u up with potentials, ain't no shame in that, u say u a proffesional in ur career, join the association of ur profession and meet like minded people and stay away from the Chris and Johns out there.

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 15:06

kwa kwa kwa Mathata.  O mfeditse

realist
13 Aug 2009 15:11

At 34, is this a case of all work and no play... and that is why you are in this predicarment?

sponono
13 Aug 2009 15:11

Matswakabele   --googling the name and  checking the ID number....well i never thought of that...well i guess there are some scumbags out there

Felfel...i think the payment-involved ones have the potential of attracting the desperados....dontyathink...i mean if you have to spend your hard-earnerd money to find a complete stranger who might turn out to be a serial killer or just doin research....that screams "I'm at my witts end, and I think I'm gonna die alone..so even if I spend my last cent looking..I'll do it"

ont the other hand..it could also come with the loaded desperados who wont mind spending it on you..

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 15:15

@ Ms Jay - you mean to say that 20 out of those 34 you didn meet @ least one guy that did it for you? confused?  Did I say I met 34 guys?

were you married b4 or in a relationship that didn work out hence the need to try the internet? Relationship that was 3 yrs old and did not work out.

What were you doing b4 you tried the internet that failed to work for you?  Studying.  Got introduced to people, went out, met people.  Put my fabulous self  out there.  The t-shirt is now worn out.  Ke koropa ka yona.  Online dating was my last resort.

Ms. Jay
13 Aug 2009 15:15

sponono
13 Aug 2009 15:16

hey peeps am tryin to get on the sacupid site, cant find my city after selecting south africa...maybe I'll change and say I'm from Guitemala- it has a nice exotic  ring to it dontchathink........for some reason instead of city they have "departments"   LOL so I'm from guitemala in the department of Juitapa...

felfel
13 Aug 2009 15:16

LOL, oh mathata ur very extreme.

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 15:21

@ realist
Of the above list you forgot the most important point:
What are your hobbies?  This is under similarities.  Hence I said -  we need not to be twins but also not poles apart
That normally determines whether your relationship will fly or needs some tweaking there and there or is just not worth it. Tru dat

Btw, you also need to be streetwise; education alone is not going to deliver your ideal man. Very versatile in that arena.  You see me during the day, serious and all, outside work, my black ghetto life comes out (ghetto in a nice way).

felfel
13 Aug 2009 15:22

hai andazi Spopo, just sharing qha...


Online dating was my last resort..........why are you even resorting Matswakabele?? do u feel u need a man in ur life? i can understand if u in a rush to start a family ke, otherwise just realx man and stop putting urself through dire situations.


Ms. Jay
13 Aug 2009 15:22

@ Ms Jay - you mean to say that 20 out of those 34 you didn meet @ least one guy that did it for you? confused? Did I say I met 34 guys? no huni - I meant 20 out of those 34 YEARS.....

M - when you run out of options go back to your maker...only He knows who and how....stop running hither and tither - when u hide yourself in your maker, your man will show forth.......

cleve
13 Aug 2009 15:23

im looking for a men ...Sowetan news paper, i was areal devil ,Yes i was looking for love but i endup doing Masepa.

KWA KWA KWA KWA KWA. ROTFLMAO...........  with tears in my eyes O MY GOSH!!!!!!!. Mathatha at her best

mstick
13 Aug 2009 15:23

kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa at this article enjoyed reading it now back to reading responses

Ms. Jay
13 Aug 2009 15:25

M - sorry to ask what were you studying? you sound very financially secure

Ms. Jay
13 Aug 2009 15:26

I pray you use wisdom when it comes to matters of your heart....later!

cleve
13 Aug 2009 15:27

MATHATHA PLEASE STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KWA KWA KWA KWA KWA

mathata
13 Aug 2009 15:29

my dear my words for you is go to  expensive resturant,Hotels,shops ,even if you can order salad n drink n eat it for four hours is ok.

you can go to Hilton Weiner n fit clothes,once you see something smaller to your size takeit n go to fitting room n ask if they have bigger sizes.... just to be busy.

you are going to meet ppl of your standard at the right time n place.

play it cool,Someone decent will eye you.

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 15:39

@ Ms Jay : studied Master of Commerce in Project Management (MComPM)
Financially secure - not sure.  But I must say God has blessed me.
Thanks for the prayer.

@mathata - I'm taking your advice.  Going to try that.

Matswakable
13 Aug 2009 15:42

Guys - thank you so much for your comments - some of you are very very fonny.

Please don't stop, keep them coming.  Unfortunately, I have to leave the office, as I am meeting one cyber buddy at The March.  We have been chatting for some time now.  We have spoken about my list and he seems to be sharing my sentiments.  By the way - he has his own list.

I will let you know how it went later tonight .

Cheers.

dali
13 Aug 2009 15:44

i dont believe dis story.. sori M wa hemba!

Sobza
13 Aug 2009 15:45

Online dating is a no no.....I've realised that people are fake and its dangerous.

mstick
13 Aug 2009 15:52

"A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ, that a man should have to seek Him first to find her" ... i learn that from Nonny and it is very very true

This is sos true i tell i for 1 have a testimony about this

Loreal
13 Aug 2009 16:12

I've realised that people are fake and its dangerous.

Umnganiwami wathola i Ex yakhe ku FB,ubaba wengane yakhe yokuqala(first born) ku FB, iBF anayo njengamanje wayithola ku FB so akanankinga maybe if it was not for FB ngabe u Single lol

Green.arrow
13 Aug 2009 16:41

LOL GA ... well with it, you will never go wrong
..wheew,im back at one piece...thank u  BA.....im taking that phrase to heart,...sharing it even......

Tshd21
13 Aug 2009 16:55

I say everybody should do whatever makes them sleep at night, what's with the judging vele??

Love comes in different forms, and places. I met my man through the interned but I wasn't looking for love. We met through some crazy website, talked privately and became friends. Shifted out friendship to e-mail, later cell phones, and then decided to meet, the rest is history...

If you feel you wanna date through the internet, do it. That is a choice, the same as people  make choices to only date people with money, cars, or those that go to church, so why not??

Matswakable
14 Aug 2009 09:43

@ dali : i dont believe dis story.. sori M wa hemba!

my love believe.  I experienced it. Fonny as it may, it did happen.

Sslave
14 Aug 2009 09:53

Hey Tswaki, how did the meeting with your cyber buddy at The March go? Did he also say he's horny?

Matswakable
14 Aug 2009 09:53

Ok right.  Last night I met my cyber BF for dinner at The March - he was okay, it was okay.  Nothing to write home about.  He was everything he mentioned during our cyber chats and telephone discussions.  One thing I kept digging for was chemistry - it did not exist.  I want to believe that it is a process and in due time, I will experience it with him.

Verdict - I am going to give him a chance.  As Manthaka puts it :
I always heard gore "monna o hlatswa ke mosadi" when I grew up
you always here people bare "ke mothotse a apara brentwood; o itsi go apara kanna"
 

I am going to do just that.  Ke tlile go motlhatswa, ebile ke morute le go apara.  I just hope ga a sturbbon.

Sslave
14 Aug 2009 10:01

Ke tlile go motlhatswa, ebile ke morute le go apara. tltltlt you go girl!! was he wearing LEE jeans le t-shirt ya toyota? Good luck hey.

sponono
14 Aug 2009 10:17

Matswakable

there's something to be said about "learning to love someone"...so take your time maybe this is your partner at least when you are not too attached emotionally you will learn to like a lot of things about him..uzoba objective...

have just joined the SAcupid site  will see how it goes...LOL

Matswakable
14 Aug 2009 10:26

@ Spo - please just make sure you don't get hooked.  That thing is addictive.  Did you come right with choosing your country and city?  Good luck hey

--googling the name and checking the ID number....well i never thought of that...well i guess there are some scumbags out there 
 
There is a database on the net with doctors names, practice numbers, id numbers, qualifications and their practice's address.  So that is how I got his id number.

Molilo
14 Aug 2009 11:02

@ Matswa can u please send the link need to check someone

Manthaka
14 Aug 2009 11:29

@Tswaki
I am just glad you did not experience much negatives this time; give him a chance; 
you may slowly get hooked without realising...

zozoe
14 Aug 2009 11:50

good luck Matswakabela

maud
14 Aug 2009 12:11

Matswakable- please if ga etse go apara ,u apara brentwood, live him like that he will for ever be yours, just try to change him wena utlabona he will leave you. 


Mafresh
14 Aug 2009 12:31

Hilton Weiner Mathata????????? U r damn expensive mosadi.  O matlholadibona kannete, LOL.

The March, Matswakable??? He ha o ipehe fatshe nhee( ha o na PHD syndrome), thatha Tswaki

Manthaka
14 Aug 2009 12:35

@Maud-please if ga etse go apara ,u apara brentwood, live him like that he will for ever be yours

Mara o tlaya le yena kae ka Brentwood?

Ms. Jay
14 Aug 2009 12:44

well - @ least it better than the last 3.....keep us posted [sounds noosey]

faraimagic
14 Aug 2009 13:10

Convicted of Love!

mstick
14 Aug 2009 13:16

Okay

Cande
14 Aug 2009 13:26

I just love the niger dude

maud
14 Aug 2009 13:34

everywhere babes, as long as wena utlaba ole motle and utsweri style, yena he can just go on ka brendwood tsa hae and if unali brown ke tlamo rekela e black gore a gone kgoditshentsha.( i hope my tswana is understandable) ke ya leka bathong.

Matswakable
14 Aug 2009 16:29

Sorry guys had a hectic day.

@Molilo
 http://www.home-affairs.gov.za/enquiry/marital/status/marital_status.asp

@Manthaka - I am just glad you did not experience much negatives this time;
not that there were no negatives - hence go moruta go apara + POSTURE.  

@Ms Jay - so far, he is better than the last 3.  And will definitely keep you posted.  

I need to find a stunning outfit, he asked me to accompany him to a do - (Black Tie affair).  So we will see.

Floh
15 Aug 2009 17:24

Interesting topic, Matswakable.............I was once hooked on internet dating.


Isn't Khaphela, the guy that you met Matswa ? He is very beautiful inside.

I was once hooked on online dating, most guys are big and nje.

Floh
15 Aug 2009 17:37

What are 18yrs old doing on online dating, this kids are all over.

Vesa
16 Aug 2009 13:53

At least you are keeping an open mind about this one?

VusiK
11 May 2011 22:33

I have never laughed as long nor as Hard at anything in a very Long Time ...

Xarah
11 May 2011 23:24

Love is unexplainable


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