After a longish break from working normal office hours, I’ve returned to the workforce. It has been a nice break, no doubt… And only today I realised I had forgotten how interesting workplace dynamics can be.
In the office, there are people that you work directly with, and others that you don’t, but you’re all working towards one goal anyway, so you get to work together whether you like it or not. So…after my longish break, I’ve kind of gained a new eye of looking at what happens in the office…attitudes galore, I'm telling you. Here's some of them,
The Secretary
First, you get the office secretary, or receptionist or switchboard whatwhat. You can never be sure where you stand with her. She greets everyone with a smile; she’s friendly with clients and customers, only because she is expected to be. She has a name for everyone in the office, can pronounce every swear word with her teeth firmly clenched and basically knows everyone’s business.
The Bullies
Then there's that line manager who’s honestly just not so bright. He likes scoring brownie points with other people’s ideas. You do all the work, he gets all the credit. That one who gets you to brainstorm then he does the presentation. Yes, him! He pulls rank and you have to grin and bear it in the name of subordination and wait patiently for that one day when his domkop will be found uncovered.
I’m not sure what’s worse… him or that manager who’s just never happy… no matter what you do. She allows no creative freedom and it’s either you understand her or you are dumb. Could be… her husband is cheating with a younger woman, the Director never approves her work, she doesn’t get paid that much, and actually only has one meal a day. The reason she’s cranky is…she’s hungry, broke and frustrated. She’s also worried you’ll soon take her job or even get a better position…hence she goes out of her way to make you hate that place – just some tactic to claim her territory – coz then you’ll end up leaving and she’ll keep her job.
Or that stubborn guy that you’re supposed to be supervising? He never keeps to deadline and apparently he leads the conversations about how you are “the black face of the company”. Your sin? Being young and bright. He cant take that!
What about the cleaning lady who somehow ALWAYS forgets to empty your bin…or vacuum your corner. She opens everyone’s windows every morning mara wena you always find your office smelling a little funny. She collects everyone’s cup every afternoon except for yours. What’s funny, you two are very friendly in the corridors, you just somehow slip her mind when it comes to her work. She’s most probably even an oldish woman your mom’s age and you’re finding it difficult to ask her to vacuum under your desk too.
Ever had that old magriza who’s waaay past retirement? She refuses to learn new ways and she believes she’s the infotank of the company – no matter what responsibility you give her, she takes it waay to seriously. If it’s the key to the storeroom that she has to keep, she’ll guard it with her life – you put her in charge of petty cash, she will count it like her pension depended on it.
How about that guy who…is the last one to show up in the morning… yet come 4pm, time to knock off, his desk is empty, like he never occupied it. He complains about EVERYTHING! He speaks English in an ANC tone, He knows THE FREEDOM CHARTER off by heart, and he is always ready to jump and point at discrimination.
Then there's that one that is ALWAYS on his desk - never takes a lunch break! he's forever looking serious and at-work., meanwhile we all know all he does is download movies and porn.
All in all... the office is a very interesting place. Characters galore.
Which one are you?
What are some of the names that you've given your colleagues - especially your managers...and did they ever find out?
Ever been bullied at work?
How interesting is your workplace?