7de Laan is on fire. That's why.
Just do it. You won't regret it!
So you're not a 7de Laan viewer - no stress - hell, you don't even have to speak a word of Afrikaans to enjoy the glory that is 7de Laan these days.
There's an amazing ladies prison
spinoff storyline going on presently that will allow new viewers to tuck in and enjoy without the need to understand much of what's been happening in Die Laan.
You can catch-up with the omnibus on SABC2 this Sunday (17 June) at 13h30 or you can watch them right now on
SABC2's YouTube channel where the latest five episodes are always available. (
Only the latest 5 episodes are available at time - so at point of publishing you will only be able to view this weeks episodes - so do not delay.)
For backstory purposes, I'll bring you up to speed...
Everyone is crazy and super extra - but in the fun way that makes great television!
The current storyline at play is very, very heavy handed in airtime - like we get 7 seconds of Hillside and its
boring happenings - so you aren't gonna be lost enjoying these episodes as stand-alones.
Familiar viewers and readers will recognise some of these characters but let's quickly update you on what you need to know so you can get up to speed and enjoy all the glory and comedy that these episodes have to offer:
No, she doesn't always dress this way - normally she's as Fab as ever.
Inmate #1: Mariaan
Mariaan is the reason we're enjoying this storyline. The prison storyline is the result of her arrest at the end of May 2018.
Mariaan is a pretty shady bitch. But she's a mother, and very protective of her husband. With all her faults, she's incredibly understanding and hard not to love.
Due to a feud - might have been one she conjured in her own mind that had absolutely nothing to do with her - Mariaan blinded hotshot lawyer Lesedi Moloi last year, with the help of Justin (Amanda - see below's - love of her life).
Mariaan's motivation for the crime was that Chris, her husband, when they were younger, shot a guy and let his then best friend Jacob take the fall.
Jacob goes to jail and years pass before Lesedi arrives on the scene at Hillside. Chris has looked after Lesedi to atone his guilt on Jacob taking the fall for his crime as a youth - and Lesedi, being the lawyer, gets close to Chris for the truth. Turns out Mariaan didn't even know this.
Out of revenge, Lesedi befriends Chris and gets him drunk and stages a situation where she gets him to fake shoot Justin, posing as a home intruder. Payback's a bitch. She does this and helps Justin and Amanda flee the country.
Chris finds out the truth and tells Mariaan. Worried about Lesedi's influence and future ramblings - and also because Mariaan is super extra and needs to one-up a bitch - she hires said Justin (damn, yeah, this is a real go-between guy) - to blind Lesedi - albeit slowly.
The plan doesn't go to plan when Justin begins getting feelings for Lesedi and worrying about her. (At this time Amanda is already behind bars).
Lesedi regains her sight but two months ago, she finds one of Justin's hidden cameras in her office - I mean who leaves evidence?
Lesedi later finds incriminating evidence on Chris's laptop only because Mariaan used Chris's laptop - not because they're poor or anything but because I'm sure Mariaan is technically challenged - and Justin comes clean about everything.
Lesedi offers Justin his freedom to be state witness against Mariaan and as she prepares to flee the country; Mariaan Welman's own daughter, Alexa - Amanda's doppelganger - turns her in.
For more details on the turn of events read this recap: Mariaan Welman will face her day in... Jail
***
Doppelganwoza Amanda!
Inmate #2: Amanda
Don't ask questions - because we can't even answer them. Writers of the show included.
Amanda is Alex Welman (Mariaan Welman's daughter)'s identical doppelganger.
No, they are not related, but the producers scored with getting more bang for their buck with the talented Carina Nel playing dual roles.
Justin - yes above mentioned, who blinded Lesedi - loved Amanda before a tragic accident took him from her - relax just a very long soapie coma. He moves to Hillside and baffled with how much Mariaan's daughter Alexa looks like her - falls in love and dates her.
Amanda resurfaces - and she's pissed. Eventually, with Alexa's own brothers' help (Mariaan's son) Rickus - yes that family is dodge as F; tries to shoot Alexa. She does not succeed.
Lesedi tries to help Justin and Amanda flee the country and set them up in a foreign land in exchange for Justin's help on the Chris framing murder thing above.
Amanda is caught by the cops and arrested.
She is later freed on parole.
Amanda is recurited by Justin after his biological father returns and he is murdered at a New Years Day dinner. He's an awful human being and Amanda immediately confesses to his murder.
Amanda was Justin's love of his life and is currently pregnant with his baby in prison, but he doesn't know this.
Oh and the role is played in dual by Carina Nel - both Amanda and Alexa are polar opposites. We are #TeamAmanda for everything - this prison storyline included.
***
If Shady Had a Past, it would be Bonita - also not her real name.
Inmate #3: Bonita
She's always come from the wrong side of the tracks but she's tried hard to put her past behind her.
Well, that was until she unhinged herself and slept with her brother-in-law and fell pregnant with her baby (not her fault but the actress fell pregnant and the writers scrambled - so we forgive).
A very lonely and isolated character, Bonita's only claim to love and this world is her infant son Daniel who has recently been diagnosed with an immune deficiency disease.
He needs a bone marrow transplant and the only suitable donor is his half sister Karmen.
Vanessa, Karmen's mother, initially reluctant, needs time to wrap her head around all the implications for Karmen. Bonita, being fierce, has no time to waste.
She immediately goes to her dark past and calls up Tony to arrange a back door doctor - those ones with flyers you see at the traffic lights of dodgy intersections.
She kidnaps Karmen - mere hours after Vanessa eventually agrees to this - but without this knowledge, takes Karmen for a back door marrow transplant from a
mute extra doctor.
Now this is the second time Karmen has been kidnapped in 18 months. Yeah this is a dramatic soapie! Repetive - no way!!
Clearly Bonita has not kidnapped before. Despite having a criminal rap sheet which reads like it's own soapie, she's eventually caught. And immediately imprisoned.
She's also delusional. We call her Bon-bon.
****
You bet your ass you better belive she's the craziest B of all!
Inmate #4: Vivian
Vivian is one of 7de Laan's most colourful crazy characters. She's the recently (2015) introduced twin sister of long standing and dearly beloved Charmaine.
Vivian kidnapped her own sister and assumed her identity out of revenge, eventually shooting Charmaine's husband Neville.
Vivian is declared cuckoo - and boy is she - but in the absolutely craziest, most hilarious way ever - and she's institutionalised.
Earlier this year, bored with her life, Vivian hatches an eleborate but crazy plan to escape the asylum - and then confronts Charmaine.
She eventually flees after a tearful confrontation, going on about how she was never given a proper life - and is on the run.
Vivian is eventually hunted down and imprisoned. No asylum for you love.
Did we mention she's absolutely crazy? Episode 2 (Tuesday 12 June) introduces the character to her prison setting and it's the funniest episode of 7de Laan. Ever.
She barks at Bonita. Barks. Woof!
***
Holier Than Thou Matry Emma thinks this is Convent
Inmate #5: Emma Miems
While all the above inmates are presently 7de Laan regulars (well doppelganger versions of Amanda and Vivian), Emma was a former 7de Laaner until 2015.
She was previously imprisoned for shooting her stalker in self defence.
He threatened her and her child, but due to poor legal representation did not get off and was imprisoned.
She was a fairly good character, but prison has deluded her and turned her hard.
Do yourself a favour and read
Tuesday 12 June's recap after viewing the episode and you will get into the pysche of what prison has done to Emma.
She's now known as Miems and is feared by all inmates.
However, she's recently been granted parole - so how long her reign of Martyr Sister Miems lasts is yet to be seen.
Girl calls the shots behind bars!
***
Dance with the Devil and Dance with your Meds
Inmate #6: Natalie
In a revenge crime, after putting her father away in jail - which was warranted - Natalie targeted Xander Meintjies - Charmaine's son-in-law.
She posed as his paralegal and weaved her way into his life.
She set Xander up for raping her a few years ago, which he went to jail for until he was aquitted and it was proven that Natalie fabricated the story. Seems she'd done this before.
Girl has issues, that's all I'm saying.
Revenge kicked in when Natalie got her own mother to kidnap Xander's daughter - Karmen (before Bonita did this) last March 2017 out of revenge.
Natalie was eventually found out to be the culprit and got a bitch slap of note from Vanessa - Xanders' then wife - and she was locked behind bars.
Since then she's assumed the role of a bully and completely derailed. But she is fun we promise.
***
That's he hubby, all bald and plastic there. Also his half bodied. And fake.
Inmate #7: Lissie
There's a plethora of colourful inmates who could fit this role.
And They ALL do!
But we have silent (read: extra - oh and is she
extra) Lissie. She's completely cuckoo - actually, who isn't here??
She may be pretending to be batsh*t crazy, but she carries a half bodied mannequin around as her husband who goes everywhere she goes. She's silent (due to her literally being an extra), and even scores her own cell and dining room table because of her extra.
She's brilliant.
Hint: Watch out for her and her hubby in all the scenes, there are frequent cameos and she owns the background scenes.
There are also some other wacky and really fun new characters you'll will fall in love with - and they deliver the most laughing I've ever done in any local production. Go check it out!
**************************************************
So there you have, what are you waiting for? Watch 7de Laan this Sunday or on SABC 2's
YouTube Channel
When you're done, read and check out the Photo Recaps for more starting with Day 1
*** 7de Laan Monday to Friday - 18h00, SABC 2 ***