Yet nobody wore Orange for 7de Laan's new spin-off "7de Tronk"
7 Stars of our new show: Mariaan, Amanda, Emma "Miems", Liefie, Natalie, Vivian and Bonita are the cast of our new spin-off.
Someone at SABC 2, please commission what could easily be the best part of 7de Laan, this female prison storyline to a fully fledged telenovela.
For the purpose of this recap, this is an entirely different show aptly called "
7de Tronk". Let's leave logic at the door, that all of Hillside's bad femme fatale's happened to land up in
the same Cell Block and let's just enjoy the campy different drama this storyline is bringing to the show.
Let's enjoy through a photo recap (because some of this glory needs to be seen) of what went down in
Day One Bonita's First Day in Hillside Cell-Block B...
7de Tronk
The entire episode takes place within this female prision, and the show even changes the title card from the familar Hillside look to this jail setting. Pity they couldn't also change the name.
Also I didn't miss Hillside. At all.
The third cell member is basically a painting on the wall - all she does is creepily 'sleep' and spy on them.
Bonita wakes up to the complete disbelief that she's in jail? Has Bon-bon completely lost the plot? Did she really expect that kidnapping Karmen would not have her land up behind bars?
Luckily for Bonita she has the best cellmate ever:
Alexa Amanda.
I'm so excited they brought Amanda back - I was sad when I thought we would never see her (besides a smash cut of her on the phone to Justin every time he needed help) when she was arrested for Langley's murder in January this year.
Amanda really is the best version of a character to play for Carina Nel - she lets the actress really shine in the role; whereas Alexa is kinda an annoying snooze. Luckily this episode doesn't hold back on Amanda and we're treated to a lot as she frames this episode and brings us and Bonita up to speed on what's happening in Cell 23.
No your eyes don't deceive you Bonita, that's Mariaan Welman being bullied.
Oh and Amanda is pregnant. Thankfully the show doesn't waste time holding this storyline in suspense of who's the daddy. Amanda confesses it's Justin's baby - but after pretending to be pregnant for Langley earlier, it's ironic she actually did fall pregnant with Justin's baby.
Has anyone checked if the third cellmate is alive?!
It's almost a bit sad to see a pregnant woman behind bars, but if anything - Amanda's pregnancy softens the character, but doesn't lose any of her quirk or attitude; so it's a welcome plot device.
However, the pregnancy looks incredibly fake, and you'll see from some of the pics - almost so bad that you're wondering if she's hiding a pillow there to get some sympathy from 'Liefie' - but I guess that's just the 7de Laan prop department not investing in a proper pregnancy belly.
Spent three minutes trying to do the math for when Amanda is giving birth to her pillow.
The pregnancy angle is also a good way to get Amanda and Bonita to bond very quickly over Motherhood and they play off each other quite well - the two actress's have great chemistry when there's no friction between them.
Look back at Alexa and Bonita's recent interactions because of Daniel and it felt forced, and even earlier this year, when Amanda was on the scene, Bonita's friction with Amanda was felt. The two quickly and easily fall into a very comfortable space with each other.
It almost makes you feel bad for the third cellmate who's going to be a third wheel with zero interaction with either of them. Poor girl.
Amanda's eye roll at Bonita delusions is life.
"7de Tronk" actually taught me something tonight - which I hope is true - I have always wondered what happened to inmates who were pregnant - and assuming this is a women's prison, said inmate would have to have gotten pregnant before.
They are allowed to carry their baby to term and two full years once given birth to - to which the baby will leave the mother for the duration of her sentence.
Now given that Amanda is in jail for murder, which is quite long - okay normally on paper, not in this country - are we to expect that Justin will be a daddy in two years? I hope not. But that's 2020 problems.
There's an eye rolling moment where Bonita's sanity is yet again questioned - seems to be happening a lot lately - where Bonita suggests that she will take Amanda's baby and have a sister for Daniel.
Amanda wastes no time eye rolling the crazy that is Bonita and quickly moves on. It's alarming how quickly she's washing off Bon-bon's craziness and embracing her new
roomie cellmate.
We finally touch base and see what a week behind bars has done to Mariaan - oh and she's not surviving.
Quickly, Bonita becomes Amanda's new shadow and follows her around jail on her first day. Who was Amanda's bestie before this? Did the third cellmate just fall by the wayside and get ditched for Bon-bon?
The second 'gang' is quickly introduced, you remember Natalie - who originally kidnapped Karmen - yeah Bonita you owe her some recognition in your crime. Natalie is clearly the ring leader here and has Dora (a silent henchmen who poisoned her church group - God I love her already!)
And then there's newest recruit, Mariaan Welman, who's only been there for a week and is clearly the weakest of the link.
Crazy Natalie comes out to play and for the first time I love the character - she holds nothing back and sets up a former cellmate with an illegal weapon during a routine search simply because the girl annoyed her.
Also, she seems to be the only character who has managed to put Mariaan in her place - not even Chris has succeeded in that. Natalie might be my new favourite crazy.
It's no Oppie, but it's got Mean Girls Cell Block 23 kinds of drama!
"7de Tronk's" version of Oppie is so much better on every level possible. No one is happy and chirpy, the insults go flying back and forth, there's hostile food take overs, Mariaan Welman actually eats and nervously so, there's a few interesting extra cellmates who get the best back stories ever.
We found Bonita's original family - even the one chick looks like she could be her sister.
Everyone seems to have their own table, based on their cell cred or what crimes were commited to get them thrown behind bars. We have an entire family; mother and two daughters who killed their father and mistress in a hotel room. No one messes with them apparently.
I would love a storyline where Bonita down the road realises she's related to the mother - because there's definately a relation of crazy there.
Lissie and her 'hubby.'
There's Natalie's crony, Dora, who poisoned the women from her church's tea because they dissed her ginger biscuits - damn if there was ever a motivation for the best crime ever - this was it.
Dora immediately earns my respect as best secondary prison villian just for her rationale.
The colourfulness that is the inmates takes a better step for the crazy when there's an inmate Lissie who goes around with a naked mannequin as her boyfriend and pretends to be crazy just to get her own table and a single cell for her own. I mean how brilliant is this women? She wins at this prison game!
Already the cast of '
7de Tronk' is legit more exciting and absolutely colourful and off the bat extra than 7de Laan!
If this prison had a slogan, I'm sure Amanda has nailed it!
Bully Natalie, who clearly thinks she runs the show here - well in Sister Miem's absence - we'll get to her later - sees Bonita as some threat. Can we blame her? This isn't Bonita's first stint behind bars and her previous jail was apparently more hard-core.
Natalie ups her dominance to Bonita who doesn't waste time fighting back at Bonita, especially when it comes to threats on Daniel. This is the Bonita we love; with backbone and street smarts to go ghetto on anyone.
You might have found your match Natalie.
Man, Natalie hates any of the Meintjies clan, including those exiled for sleeping with Xander and having his illegitimate baby.
In fact, if it weren't through Natalie's actions of kidnapping Karmen - Bontia would have had Daniel, whom she claims is her whole world. Should Bon-bon be kinda grateful, well inadvertently?
Amanda warns Bonita that Natalie is completely crazy with a few screws loose since her stint in 'The Hole'.
The Hole is basically mind-set punishing where a badly behaved cellmate is put in a closet-sized dark hole for any length of duration - Natalie was there for a few weeks and came out completely crazier and bitchier.
Amanda also runs an art class in the prison, in an only Amanda style fashioned.
This episode really sets the tone with the charm and the quirk that 7de Laan doesn't have. Some of these lines scripted or the tone, or typical characters is as far from sunshine and happy 7de Laan that makes this spin-off storyline an absolute gem.
Congrats to the writers and directors for shifting the tone and embracing this storyline - it's good tonal shift for the show.
How many kids is Amanda expecting?!
Amanda and Bonita's friendship grows very quickly from cellmate to BFFs and I'm loving this friendship. Amanda takes Bonita under her wings, explains the day-to-day going alongs and how to survive Cell 23.
However it isn't long until Natalie strikes and leaves a puddle of water on the floor, which Amanda and Bonita slip on. Amanda gets hurt, but Bonita, worried about someone other than herself, tries to get help for Amanda.
Non-spoiler: Amanda and the baby both live.
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Shockingly, besides Bonita actually caring about Amanda, Mariaan shows some ounce of humanity and actually is worried about
the girl who looks just like her daughter and shot her Amanda. Damn, prison has softened the once bitch that was Mariaan Welman.
Oh, speaking of which, I have a feeling we're going to get a Mariaan and Bonita showdown. Both in rival cells, but their subtle eye glances they give each other is
everything and I cannot wait for that!
Oh, I cannot wait for Bonita vs. Mariaan - the eye stares alone are everything.
Looks like the mop behind Mariaan has the same prison hairstylist she has.
Bet Mariaan is appreciating Evelina by the hour in Cell Block 23.
In the best scene ever, we are treated to Mariaan scrubbing the Oppie Cafeteria floors and actually down to her knees - we are given more of Mariaan's humanity where she actually cares for Amanda due to her being pregnant - but we are also treated to see more of the dynamic of Mariaan and Natalie's partnership/relationship.
Mariaan clearly fears Natalie and actually is with her for more protection and not to get on the wrong side of her. I have a feeling Mariaan could learn a thing or three from Natalie and a few more weeks of the hard knock life, Mariaan may exceed the master and be a bigger bitch. Let's just hope.
Speaking of people Mariaan Welman bows down to.... her husband Chris comes to visit her. Despite her off-screen telling him she does not want him to visit.
She quickly falls back into old Mariaan (the one we had a few episodes of before her arrest) who rambled on about her children writing her off blah blah. Yawn.
Chris, shocked to see his wife in this condition - I know we are all feeling you Chris - demands to find out who gave her that bust lip as he "will handle it" - when did Chris Welman get so crony?
Upset that her kids haven't shown concern, well at least her prized possession; Rickus, an upset Mariaan asks Chris to leave and he, too easily, listens and leaves. Can't blame him with the sight that now is his wife.
Also, would it not have been too hard for him to bring a few cosmetics for her so that she doesn't look too dishevelled? - I mean even a hair brush wouldn't have been too much!
Thought - Had the show cut this scene and not shown Chris, this would have most probably been the only episode of SA television with an only female cast. Way to empowerment!
Bonita still going on with her same old story about needing to phone Xander to find out about baby, Daniel drives Amanda crazy - who just informs her that both she and the baby are fine, except for a few ribs - offers Bonita her phone card 'with a lot of money' -
with what money?! What's the currency here?!
It's actually a beautiful scene and further solidifies their friendship to BFF level. But I must say, Bonita's been acting whack - you'd swear this is her first time behind bars. Clearly she knows you don't get phone time if you act crazy and get in the warden's bad books.
Which takes us down to the bitch slap of note between Bonita and Natalie...
... which didn't take long.
Off the bat Liefie is called to intervene - and actually too soon - I wanted to see more of the fight between Bonita and Natalie.
When Bonita is on a mission, she's on a mission. With her call to Xander cut short by Natalie, she continues to try get hold of him in the interim making an enemy out of Warden Liefie. I wonder if we will even know her real name.
Liefie, although being described by Amanda, is a light hearted warden, loves her music, allows certain leeways, and goes lighter on the girls. Also apparently in the pocket of this "Sister Miems" (who again we'll get to later).
However Liefie doesn't seem to take any nonsense from Bonita and immediately after her retaliation throws Bonita into "The Hole." Don't make enemies on Day 1 Bonita. This isn't your first prison spree.
However Bonita has the best bitch face ever, so I'll give her some slack for that.
In The Hole, Bonita hears a familiar voice, maybe a ghost from her past or someone in her head. Although the person isn't immediately shown, that voice is clearly Vivian. I have been waiting for her to make her appearance and I cannot wait to see which part of the Amanda vs. Natalie feud she is on.
Revenge is a dish served... immediately. Amanda wastes no time to get her revenge on Natalie and show her that she's actually the top dog here.
She ties Natalie up and threatens her that she is in for murder, and doesn't mind adding another body to that charge. Also, in true BFF and taking Bonita under her wing, she tells Natalie to back off.
Amazingly Amanda seemed to also have the power to have one of Natalie's own; Dora - do nothing to help Natalie in her tied up situation. Man what power does Amanda actually wield here?!
The best part of Amanda's little take down is her friendly but bitchy wave at Natalie during the dinner rush...
Amanda is
everything. *
Wave*
Why is it that Mariaan is the only inmate to actually eat? This is more than we've seen Mariaan eat in her entire duration on 7de Laan.
At dinner, Liefie announces that she's expecting at least one cellmate from each cell to enter her choir - boy, off the bat we're treated to an upcoming '7de Tronk: Musical' episode - I can't wait to hear Mariaan sing even tho' she tells Natalie it will not be her.
Shortly after Liefie announces some good news - Sister Miems is back.
If you follow 7de Laan on any social media/youtube you'll see they have tried to promote 'Who is Sister Miems' ? Now the show doesn't do anything like that without a pay-off. So it did cross my mind why there was no Emma in any of the upcoming promotions in the prison stint, since we clearly know she's in prison and has been referenced a bit lately - I did kind of suspect it was Emma. However I really prayed and hoped that Sister Miems would have been Gita McGregor.
But sadly it was not; Sister Miems is revealed to be no one other than our previously beloved...
The dramatic "I don't really give a damn about this reveal" look Mariaan gives
Welcome back Emma.
Somehow being Sister Miems has entitled her to a hair stylist.
But now we have some questions... how one of 7de Laan's nicer characters became this semi-feared prisoner with some power? It just goes to show what happens behind bars can really change a person. It's making me more and more excited for this '7de Tronk' storyline. I cannot wait to see where they take these characters.
And on that note - let me leave you with the wisdom of our new favourite character Amanda.
Best Character Award: Amanda!
When do we get our #TeamAmanda shirts?!
See more about Miems and Vivian's return from The Hole in Day 2
and
See the Musical take formation and Bonita's darkest non-hole hour emerge in Day 3
*** 7de Tronk 7de Laan - Mondays to Fridays 18h00, SABC 2 ***