EPISODE TWOIt's just beyond understanding that no matter how many seasons of Survivor there are there's always someone who's totally gobsmacked when they get whacked because they've lazed around doing
nothing.Morgan didn't deliver one single moment of Survivor magic - to the extent that I've already forgotten what she looks like.
Yaxha had no choice but to get rid of her and when it happened I snuggled contentedly into my couch - espesh considering Jamie wanted to get rid of Stephenie instead. If it had happened and he'd gotten his way it would have been such a spoilsport thing to do it would have ruined everything completely.
At the moment he's the only one showing any signs of wanting to vote along aggro, competitive lines immediately. It isn't surprising considering he calls himself a "bum" as an affectionate term I don't suppose. There's something about those slitty eyes and thin lips of his that creeps me out and I don't like that he's so threatened by Steph.
This is how it all started, with everyone giving impressions about themselves and how they were feeling about everyone generally, with the majority extending the love-fest they collapsed into last week.
Nakum returned from Jim's corpse with what Margaret nursingly described as a "sick, sick feeling," which Blake took literally as he continued to heave himself all over the place.
I'm convinced the reason he got sick is because he's on steroids and his body's not coping without them. There's no other possible reason for it happening that each season it's always the most muscly out of everyone who ends up the weakest first. It's quite trippy if you think about it 'cos it suggests gyming is definitely not all it's cracked up to be.
As much I don't like Judd's thuggish exterior, I agreed with his irritation at Blake's baby attention-seeking. If you're feeling so sick you don't constantly put yourself in the centre of everthing and respond to conversations with belches.
The fact that he couldn't do a thing but kicked such butt at the challenge also suggests that he's not quite as sick as he says he is and needs to, as Brandon so hysterically said, man-up. How's him for being exactly like the scarecrow in the Wizard Of Oz? So desperately in need of brains yet coming up with faboo words of wisdom.
In contrast to the stirrings of bile at Nakum, over at Yaxha everyone chilled out, getting to know and like each other. They lounged on their beds until their tree-mail arrived, challenging them to climb a spider-thing and gather bags.
Every one them needed such a slap as they all looked so fakely thrilled at the prospect of winning the fishing equipment up for grabs. Obviously everyone knows that no Survivor who's won bait has ever been able to use it and that it'll never change the grub.
There was a smidgen of hope that it could be useful to Yaxha with the Lydia midget being a fishmonger but then they ended up having One-Shoe Boy and lost.
What was Rafe doing with that ladder? The way he flailingly battled it was the most pathetic thing ever. Even if his one glistening foot was slipping, there's no ways it should have been as impossible as it was. What was interesting was that nobody blamed him for their loss and also, that it didn't come up when they were looking for who to vote out.
Lydia and Morgan were targeted immediately and while Morgan was a natural choice, Lydia wasn't. Even though I find her constant smiling very oddball I agreed with Brandon that there was no reason to vote her out after she caught those funny little trout things.
What's up with her constant grinning though? I thought she was just generally happy until she beamed through the Pigs-in-mud Immunity Challenge which sucked so big time no-one could actually have enjoyed it.
You know, if I ever found myself on the receiving end of Jeffsipoo telling me to do such a thing I'd have to refuse and lose. The thought of having squelchy muddy shoes for 30-or-whatever more days would damage my brain to such an extent I'd way rather take the risk and simply not do it - espesh considering how impossible it was.
There's no ways any one of those teams could have won that opening group tug they started with. At first I couldn't work out what they had to do - it just seemed too crazy that they could even think one of them could of win. Not even rugby players scrumming make up the type of ground they had to conquer and also - how painful must that rope have been around their middle bits?
The cool thing about it was that Bobby-Jon's mug was the best ever and it gave Danni the opportunity to whisper rumours about Hoog being NFL to Brandon.
He's insane for not caving and sticking with his story. I have visions of him being doomed if they find out that it really is the truth - you know how they all get so huffy about someone not being honest and trusted etc. Luckily for him they're all currently too thick to realise that it's true and that that embarrassing tug-tackle of his was him showing off, inspired by it all.
As for Judd's being the hero he said he was gonna be - it didn't impress me - he's the hugest of everyone so his winning was a given. I didn’t actually care who won or lost as I don't know them enough to want them not to and as Yaxha dregged off to make their decision I was chortling away at the prospect of an annihilation.
From the looks of things they really did find it difficult to make a decision and genuinely felt grim that they had to get rid of someone. This is a very juicy sign because the more personally they take things and the more they feel about each other when they love, the more they're going to loathe when it happens. Hehehehe.
PS: The only thing that the Morgan chick could have been useful for is explaining how magicians cut their assistants into pieces. I really wish someone had asked her - I've always wanted to know but everyone I've spoken to who's had it happen to them has refused to tell me.